torque

I'm so tired of being attacked and punished for being who I am, seeking what I need, expressing myself as comes natural to me. Sometimes I don't know how to make space for myself that's big enough to breathe in, small enough to feel comforting, welcome enough for other people to share with me but solitary enough that I can be strong in myself. I feel like those cells we had to draw in elementary school, except my membrane is far too penetrable, my insides too susceptible to osmosis. I need a border that's neither a membrane nor a wall - maybe a fence with a gate and a warm, friendly but firm sentinel.