i've been away for a while, its been a super busy time and life's been very full. I've been working on recovery, finding new digs, dealing with my job, dating, doing some counselling, hanging with my dad and a couple of friends and other stuff too.
need to get back on here and check in every so often though.
i've been clean for a few months i guess, whatever the case, i feel way better. i'm working out again getting firm again, eating again. definitely putting on weight as my pants are arguing with me these days. i'm dating, the ladies like me. i suppose i'm a charmer. but i'm not the only one.
work is going well, challenging, busy, i'm getting along with everyone. it feels like i belong there. of course more money would be nice, but that's sometime away.
i bought a freaking condo. a place of my own. i'll be house poor. but its mine. 700 square feet of loft space on the east side of downtown, leslieville, with a gas stove and concrete ceiling. its very me. it was made possible with help from my dad who'd going to sell his house and head to india. i'll be the only member of my family in ontario. well i suppose my former partner chrissy is family when she's not pissed at me which is often.
i've gone out dancing, been social, seen old friends, made new ones, bought electronic music software and a new laptop and i met a woman i fell for named katie. i told her everything. she told me she didn't want to get involved with me cause i have too much baggage and then sat on my lap and made out with me for an hour. classic.
my baggage is a lifetime of chaos. what i've done is do something about it. i've survived. i've worked on myself and i've found some semblance of sanity and i guess a kind of contentment and happiness. i suppose someone will be willing to carry that bag one day. maybe. i won't hold my breath.
i'll survive whatever the fuck life throws at me, i've survived a shitload so far. it won't break me. nothing will.
i'm going to live. i'm going to get old and fat and fart and be and old fat farting punk who does't give a fuck. i look forward to it.
but wow i ache sometimes. already.
i don't miss her anymore. i think it's because i found me again.
need to get back on here and check in every so often though.
i've been clean for a few months i guess, whatever the case, i feel way better. i'm working out again getting firm again, eating again. definitely putting on weight as my pants are arguing with me these days. i'm dating, the ladies like me. i suppose i'm a charmer. but i'm not the only one.
work is going well, challenging, busy, i'm getting along with everyone. it feels like i belong there. of course more money would be nice, but that's sometime away.
i bought a freaking condo. a place of my own. i'll be house poor. but its mine. 700 square feet of loft space on the east side of downtown, leslieville, with a gas stove and concrete ceiling. its very me. it was made possible with help from my dad who'd going to sell his house and head to india. i'll be the only member of my family in ontario. well i suppose my former partner chrissy is family when she's not pissed at me which is often.
i've gone out dancing, been social, seen old friends, made new ones, bought electronic music software and a new laptop and i met a woman i fell for named katie. i told her everything. she told me she didn't want to get involved with me cause i have too much baggage and then sat on my lap and made out with me for an hour. classic.
my baggage is a lifetime of chaos. what i've done is do something about it. i've survived. i've worked on myself and i've found some semblance of sanity and i guess a kind of contentment and happiness. i suppose someone will be willing to carry that bag one day. maybe. i won't hold my breath.
i'll survive whatever the fuck life throws at me, i've survived a shitload so far. it won't break me. nothing will.
i'm going to live. i'm going to get old and fat and fart and be and old fat farting punk who does't give a fuck. i look forward to it.
but wow i ache sometimes. already.
i don't miss her anymore. i think it's because i found me again.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
hodor:
Surreal says it nicely! I concur!
torontokillsme:
<3 :-)