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torihoney

national city..a.k.a. the ghetto

Member Since 2003

Followers 67 Following 34

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Thursday May 06, 2004

May 6, 2004
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so i know i've been away for a good while, but it's not because i don't want to be around... just extremely busy with life and work, and trying to cultivate other interests besides ones that take me away from being productive, like spending endless hours on this site... no offense wink


so life is good. not fantastic, not bright and shiny in it's possibilities and potential outcomes, but good in a way that makes me hopeful that the day after today will be better. not that today was bad... but a gradual shift up.. over time. i got a lot of things wrong a few weeks ago, a communication breakdown of sorts, but now that all has been laid out on the table, i feel that i can play the hand i was dealt, and even up the stakes, eventually. i don't feel pathetic, or weak, just cognizant of what's important to me and how i am going to have it. so i guess that's a good thing, right?

work is good. i am meeting all expectations laid out for me a few months ago, and i am being noticed by the uppity ups....progress and recognition for a hardcore work ethic and responsible nature is always a welcome feeling. so maybe there is some light at the end of the tunnel, and soon perris will be a distant memory, and i'll be able to take on new challenges...it's always nice to feel like you have a new horizon to take in.


i need to take a day to take a hundred photos and just have a good time with myself...doing something that makes me feel creative...i have an amazing camera that i haven't used much for lack of time, but i need to make it a higher priority.


and in other news, the sunrise this morning was amazing... but somewhat bittersweet... because the thing that made it look so cool was the smoke that still lingers in the air from all the fires around here. so far no one i know has lost a home or anything, but everything around here is like tinder, waiting for a match and the slightest breeze... it's a little scary at times.


and that's about it. i'll update if i think of anything profound, or if i have something more to say about, well.... whatever captures my interest. i hope you all are well.
kiss
trixel:
i don't feel pathetic, or weak, just cognizant of what's important to me and how i am going to have it. so i guess that's a good thing, right?

Sounds like the definition of calm to me.

Reminds me of an artist from the nineteenth century, and I don't remember who, whose skies were incredible: vibrant and glowing. A physical geography teacher of mine related the intensity of this painter's skies to the fact that the atmosphere was filled with ash from the Krakatoa (I believe) eruption. The ash was affecting light and reflection. kiss
May 7, 2004
trixel:
and i'm stuck in a track house in suburbia... you make your place sound almost glamorous in its difference to my dwelling.

It's not as glamorous when it's 100 degrees in here, or there are drunks fighting outside my window. Or the sirens wake me up again. robot
May 8, 2004

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