tonkakatt

my brother came over last night to hook up the wireless router and other receiver thingy on my friends computer. my brother is the shit.

the things he comes out with....ok lets start with a few weeks ago when I bought my new fridge, my other brother helped me moved it....spent the day telling me what a dumb broad I am for not measuring the fridge and doors since we ahd to take the doors off the fridge and the hopsue to get damn thing into the house. so the "cool" brother came for a ahircut that night and I was telling him about how I was picked ona ll day my the younger brother and he told me this story about how I'm not the only twit who doesn't measure things when buying stuff...actually I measured for a counter mounted stove and none fit my measurements so I got a fridge instead...since I wanted that too. anywho, the story goes like this.....my brother...." I went to buy my new posterpedic mattress and I opened up the back doors of my ambulance and measured across"....."WAIT A MINUTE???? YOU HAVE AN AMBULANCE?"...."yeah...but thats not important...so measured across and when I got there I tried to get the foundation inside and I never thoguht to measure the height...so I ended up getting a split foundation"..."YOU HAVE AN AMUBLANCE"....."yeah....but thats not important...listen....I got there and I'm backing my ambulance up to the loading dock with all my flood lights and flashing lights on...."..."YOU HAVE AN AMUBLANCE???? WHY????"..."just to have...you know in case I ever need it.....so I get the split foundation and fold the whole fucking top temperpedic matterss in half and shove the fucking thing into my ambulance and drive home fat and happy"
all of that came out while I'm cutting his hair...he's a mechanic/machinist....he has no reason to own an ambulance.

last night he comes over and he's tinkering with my computer setting up the wireless router and Janeen says "I;m going out for a smoke" he makes soem comments about cancer sticks and using mouthwash and perfume before coming back near him..so i poke my hear outside and tell her to call his Cadillac a "ghetto sled" if he says anything about her smokeing....
Ray: how was your cancer stick?
Janeen: good....I noticed your ghetto sled while I was out there
Ray: thats not a ghetto sled its a jew canoe....
fits of laughter from all of us at the unexpected comeback.
last week I asked my Dad why he had my grandmothers old ghetto sled (his cadillac broke down and she just got a new cadillac so he was driving her old one) he got pissed and said..."thats not a ghetto sled its a Cadillac for christs sake!!!!!" so thats the type of response I was expecting from my brother.

another conversation:
Me: do you have any single friends...whats that guys name you hang out with?
Ray: Joe???he's married?
me: oh,....anyone else you want to set me (or Janeen) up with?
after some back and forth about it not being a good idea and how he'd be the "asshole" yadda yadda yadda
Ray: what happens is one of you could end up giving the other "chirpies" and the other one will be mad at me and thats not good....since once you have "chirpies" there's no "tweatment"
again fits of laughter from all 3 of us.

so I asked him....do all of your friends have "chirpies"?
he said he had no idea and wanted to keep it that way.


onto today.....

I finally got to bed last night about 1:30-2ish and had to get up at 7am, so it was the race to get my day going....worked all damn day...it was lame...very slow.
got outta work and went tanning...I haven't been in over a month maybe close to 2 months.
then I went and got a pedicure...which I haven't gotten done since July (or maybe early aug. more likely july though). for anyone who knows me I have a few guilty pleasures....Yoga (haven't been in a class since spring..I miss it, need and crave it, too damn broke and time deficient to go though)
pedicures....and massages....I liek pedicures all the time..weekly/bi-weekly in the summer and monthy/bi-monthly in the winter. tanning...I love to lay down relax and just BAKE!!!!!

tonight was a bit of a "ME" night....I needed it. and this is probally the longest journal entry I've done in a while as well. I still have tons of stuff to do but damnit I need to out it all aside for a night and refresh!

Saturday I'm having my "D" party....dinner....dancing....drinking....divorce....YAY!!!!

I bought some Brazillian beer tonight its not half bad...I've killed 1 already. Its called Brahma.

if you read all of this reward yourself with a beer or something equally pleasurable.