tonkakatt

my Dad is still in the hospital. I went to see him yesterday and he asked me how long he's known me for.

thats fucked up. I guess he's on a lot of meds...I dunno. I wanted to go see him today but I'm so drained, I've got no strength to make the trip to the hospital, I can't take it physically, mentally, emotionally.


I have to hold the board meeting for the cat shelter I'm Vice President of tomorrow, I've been "acting President and treasurer" since mid August, its out Annual meeting tomorrow and I just got done printing out the meeting agenda and my formal resignation letter. we had the shit hit the fan so to speak last summer and almost all of our voting members and board members resigned, I've been barely doing a half-assed job of holding it together. organizing fundraisers, and everything else. trying to work my "real job" which is full time, as a Manager of a hair salon, and run a household with 3 dogs and 8 cats. (my bird died cuz I was streatched to thin...that was last fall). My family is more important to me, and I started volunteering for the cats, now I don't even deal with the cats, its all administrative stuff, I have 0 enjoyment from volunteering there now. and now with my Dad being so sick I really need to focus on whats important in my life. this is one of the toughest descisions I've had to make but I'm sure I'll be much better for it in the long run.

anywho...I'm pooped, I'm gonna get to bed...yeah I'm a loser its Saturday night and I'm going to bed just after 10pm.