I can't lie. I was a little sad when I left Seattle, and later I'll tell you why, but for now I would rather bask in the odor of my dog and accept her happiness in seeing me after being gone nearly 26 hours, and in dog years that is a long time.
Yeah, Seattle (and it's suburb Bellevue) was nice. The weather was fantastic and the company was very nice as well. I saw a few old friends and inherently learned something about myself that I had been wondering about, but never could find the answer too, and with the answer lead to many more questions with, "I don't know," answers. Life is full of puzzlement and wonder is it not?
Now my good friend Jennie Cornell picked me up from the Sea-Tac airstrip, and she treated me to dinner and a show before taking me to Pete's Motel for lodging before my court date. With my few hours with Jennie I realized a few things (and for those of you who do not know who Jennie is, she is a woman that I was engaged to marry but for my reasons backed out... I am a gentleman first, so I will not air dirty laundry, I'm sure any of your appropriate circles can find out the demise of the relationship if they must, just know I do love Jennie with all my heart, but I'm not, and possibly never was "in love", a lesson that I am just now learning the difference of, thank you Jennie), one is that Jennie is always going to be my "Magus". That darker half that does everything I know I can if I put forth the effort, and at one point I think I wanted that madness. She is a fantastic individual and her grace is unmatched by anyone. I challenge any woman to keep up with Jennie Cornell; two is that Jennie is no longer mine, and that is a situation every man must come to terms with no matter how long he has been away from said girl/boy, if he wants to move forward with his life (we're damn penguens); third, Jennie has found a new love and doesn't want to hurt my feelings and doesn't want to tarnish the best thing she had with someone else by taking a step toward another. Yeah, hard for me to accept and be happy about, but I hope she does fall in love with a boy who knows how to take care of her how I couldnt. The God or Science of your choosing can praise that boy.
'I have to admit, it's getting better, a little better all the time...
Can't get no worse...'
Getting Better
the Beatles
-Lead Vocal, McCartney
So what did I learn? Well, I learned that someday I do want a wife, a real one, like my Dad has now; a woman who will love me and want to take care of me because to her, that is life. And I want to find a woman that I love more than music, that fuels the very essence of my being, that makes me want to continually be a better humanities sake, not for her but for Humanity. Spoiler alert, I may even want a child.
Pretty large news eh? If you know me, it is. If you don't, well, this is big news for the world of Ian. So where to go from here? Back to work. The euphoria has drained away from my glowing climax of surviving the greatest tragedy of my life; the financial break down and lose of friends and hope in all human beings, rock bottom, broke and stuck in Oregon. I'm still very much happy, but that moment has passed and made way for back breaking, knuckle smashing work. Until the New Year, and then if all goes according to my wishes I can open my own business and be my own boss. Hopes are high.
Life is beautiful and I hope everyone the most pleasure that you can achieve. I am truly, once again, and thankfully, humbled by the simplest and most cherished of human emotion: Love. Thank you Jennie for reminding me why I'm here, to find love, and help all those who cross my path to find some as well. I hope you try and take that plunge with, wait, what's his name... Timmy? TIMMMMMMAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
So where am I going to end up? What am I going to ultimately do? Will I find that african girl that I am so desperatly seeking?
I don't know, but Ringo said it right...
"Do you need anybody...?
I need somebody to love...
I get by with a little help from my friends
Gonna try with a little help from my friends,
Get high with a little help from my friends
I get by with a little help from my friends, with a little help from my friends!!!"
-With A Little Help From My Friends
the Beatles
-Lead Vocal, Ringo Starr
Oh, and the bastards in Bellevue offered to change my charge, so all I have is a little fine to pay. Thanks for that, it was awesome to have to fly up for a day to handle that. Killer!
Yeah, Seattle (and it's suburb Bellevue) was nice. The weather was fantastic and the company was very nice as well. I saw a few old friends and inherently learned something about myself that I had been wondering about, but never could find the answer too, and with the answer lead to many more questions with, "I don't know," answers. Life is full of puzzlement and wonder is it not?
Now my good friend Jennie Cornell picked me up from the Sea-Tac airstrip, and she treated me to dinner and a show before taking me to Pete's Motel for lodging before my court date. With my few hours with Jennie I realized a few things (and for those of you who do not know who Jennie is, she is a woman that I was engaged to marry but for my reasons backed out... I am a gentleman first, so I will not air dirty laundry, I'm sure any of your appropriate circles can find out the demise of the relationship if they must, just know I do love Jennie with all my heart, but I'm not, and possibly never was "in love", a lesson that I am just now learning the difference of, thank you Jennie), one is that Jennie is always going to be my "Magus". That darker half that does everything I know I can if I put forth the effort, and at one point I think I wanted that madness. She is a fantastic individual and her grace is unmatched by anyone. I challenge any woman to keep up with Jennie Cornell; two is that Jennie is no longer mine, and that is a situation every man must come to terms with no matter how long he has been away from said girl/boy, if he wants to move forward with his life (we're damn penguens); third, Jennie has found a new love and doesn't want to hurt my feelings and doesn't want to tarnish the best thing she had with someone else by taking a step toward another. Yeah, hard for me to accept and be happy about, but I hope she does fall in love with a boy who knows how to take care of her how I couldnt. The God or Science of your choosing can praise that boy.
'I have to admit, it's getting better, a little better all the time...
Can't get no worse...'
Getting Better
the Beatles
-Lead Vocal, McCartney
So what did I learn? Well, I learned that someday I do want a wife, a real one, like my Dad has now; a woman who will love me and want to take care of me because to her, that is life. And I want to find a woman that I love more than music, that fuels the very essence of my being, that makes me want to continually be a better humanities sake, not for her but for Humanity. Spoiler alert, I may even want a child.
Pretty large news eh? If you know me, it is. If you don't, well, this is big news for the world of Ian. So where to go from here? Back to work. The euphoria has drained away from my glowing climax of surviving the greatest tragedy of my life; the financial break down and lose of friends and hope in all human beings, rock bottom, broke and stuck in Oregon. I'm still very much happy, but that moment has passed and made way for back breaking, knuckle smashing work. Until the New Year, and then if all goes according to my wishes I can open my own business and be my own boss. Hopes are high.
Life is beautiful and I hope everyone the most pleasure that you can achieve. I am truly, once again, and thankfully, humbled by the simplest and most cherished of human emotion: Love. Thank you Jennie for reminding me why I'm here, to find love, and help all those who cross my path to find some as well. I hope you try and take that plunge with, wait, what's his name... Timmy? TIMMMMMMAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
So where am I going to end up? What am I going to ultimately do? Will I find that african girl that I am so desperatly seeking?
I don't know, but Ringo said it right...
"Do you need anybody...?
I need somebody to love...
I get by with a little help from my friends
Gonna try with a little help from my friends,
Get high with a little help from my friends
I get by with a little help from my friends, with a little help from my friends!!!"
-With A Little Help From My Friends
the Beatles
-Lead Vocal, Ringo Starr
Oh, and the bastards in Bellevue offered to change my charge, so all I have is a little fine to pay. Thanks for that, it was awesome to have to fly up for a day to handle that. Killer!