Long time no Update....
Life has been a chaos latetly ill try to orginize it somewhat here:
Work: got the transfer ok... been working my butt off getting good hours and so on....little time for social but eh...
Car: Dad is looking at his Convertable tomorrow should have it in 2 weeks which brings me to....
APT: should be there soon as dad switches cars...then ill have mine and move out to the apt for good, i cant wait....
Social: Hung out over the weekend with friends... shit went good getting geared up for a Boffer Larp(Geek alert) . Im pritty stoaked about it I wish i had more time to help and more money to go into it too...luckaly my roomate has made it his point to be the larps sugar daddy... i love my friends.
Love Life: or lack there of... I got lots of girls that love to flirt with me...but thats it Im a tool to make boyfriends jellous, and to dick around. One friend of mine i connect with like no other but she is head over heals...more like lost for love with her boyfriend who is a fucking dick to her but she is blind to it as is he apperantly....
another just broke up with her boyfriend...one that i almost went out with and i still care for her ALOT.. and she dishes out her depression and woes about him to me...saying things like "I know i couldent be like her but i dont wana be a bitch and thats what she is" and "why is he obsessed with her" "i want someone who can treat me like im sexy so i can feel sexy". I do those things...and all i can think of is "why cant i be more like him...why cant you obsess over me like him...you are sexy, and i care" but i guess....im just not good enough
im falling deeper into depression in a manic form...god im fucked up....time for more meditation it helps me clear my mind...budhism has been my only solice...my only release from it all latetly....
Life has been a chaos latetly ill try to orginize it somewhat here:
Work: got the transfer ok... been working my butt off getting good hours and so on....little time for social but eh...
Car: Dad is looking at his Convertable tomorrow should have it in 2 weeks which brings me to....
APT: should be there soon as dad switches cars...then ill have mine and move out to the apt for good, i cant wait....
Social: Hung out over the weekend with friends... shit went good getting geared up for a Boffer Larp(Geek alert) . Im pritty stoaked about it I wish i had more time to help and more money to go into it too...luckaly my roomate has made it his point to be the larps sugar daddy... i love my friends.
Love Life: or lack there of... I got lots of girls that love to flirt with me...but thats it Im a tool to make boyfriends jellous, and to dick around. One friend of mine i connect with like no other but she is head over heals...more like lost for love with her boyfriend who is a fucking dick to her but she is blind to it as is he apperantly....
another just broke up with her boyfriend...one that i almost went out with and i still care for her ALOT.. and she dishes out her depression and woes about him to me...saying things like "I know i couldent be like her but i dont wana be a bitch and thats what she is" and "why is he obsessed with her" "i want someone who can treat me like im sexy so i can feel sexy". I do those things...and all i can think of is "why cant i be more like him...why cant you obsess over me like him...you are sexy, and i care" but i guess....im just not good enough
im falling deeper into depression in a manic form...god im fucked up....time for more meditation it helps me clear my mind...budhism has been my only solice...my only release from it all latetly....
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you should come hang out, i met you what? a year and a half ago?