So I wanted to tell everybody something about myself . I am a VERY mellow kind of guy and rarely , if ever , lose my temper . That said...I CAN'T FUCKING STAND BAD DRIVERS!!!!!! 
The only thing worse than somebody who cuts you off or turns without using their goddamn turn signal or whatever is if the offending vehicle has one of those dumb-ass...
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The only thing worse than somebody who cuts you off or turns without using their goddamn turn signal or whatever is if the offending vehicle has one of those dumb-ass...
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I've been doing my annual "Cat Sitting" job for my sister while she and her fiancee get to go on a vacation to Aruba for a week . Seems like I'm kinda' getting the shaft here , doesn't it ? 
So I've noticed that my sister's three cats all have serious mental illnesses...
One ( The oldest one ) is having some kind of kitty...
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So I've noticed that my sister's three cats all have serious mental illnesses...
One ( The oldest one ) is having some kind of kitty...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
linz:
man, why would your sister risk your mental and physical health to go to aruba? you might actually be the one with the problems. i think you guys should have some serious family counselling.
clara:
If your sister can afford to go to Aruba she can afford to hire a non-allergic cat sitter. Next year you put your foot down!
So I went out to an "Irish Pub" on Saturday . Let me just say that having an Irish sounding name on the place and a Guiness sign on the wall does NOT make an Irish Pub . This is especially true when they're playing "Hey-Ya" by Outkast when you walk in the door . I like Outkast , but I'm pretty sure he's not...
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VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
clara:
It's in Baltimore!
clara:
Not snow. Exactly. I kind of enjoyed it, really.
It's almost time for Lent all of you kooky Catholics . So what are YOU giving up???? Read the story that I've enclosed below BEFORE you make up your mind .
Okay , I'm going to share a little something with all of you from my tragic past . It's a story about a girl that I was dating for awhile . Trust me ,...
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Okay , I'm going to share a little something with all of you from my tragic past . It's a story about a girl that I was dating for awhile . Trust me ,...
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VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
clara:
I'm not naughty, I'm human.
hastwothumbs:
Brilliant!
If I was Catholic, I'd have to give up reading your journal for Lent.
If I was Catholic, I'd have to give up reading your journal for Lent.
I was sitting here watching Animal Planet and I was thinking...Do you think the animals that the nature show host picks out and says " Look there . Isn't that a GLORIOUS specimen " or whatever , get conceited ? I mean they ARE movie stars in a way .
I just picture some animal strutting around going " WHO'S alpha now , BEEEYOTCH????? Huh????...
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I just picture some animal strutting around going " WHO'S alpha now , BEEEYOTCH????? Huh????...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
tiamat:
i was just at the spca and i was wondering if the animals act like that. i know this is kind of sad, well alot actually, but some have been there for ever and i wonder if it is because the prettier snottier animals get picked first. i personally wanted the kitty with no tail and half and ear. he was a cutie.
linz:
yeah, don't ask..
i think i am just going to be a naked undead bitch.
shh.
i think i am just going to be a naked undead bitch.
shh.
WHOA????? 
Okay , I am REALLY getting tired of all the drama going on about "The Passion Of The Christ" . People are acting like it's the end of the freakin' world . It's a MOVIE ( a fictional work) about a bunch of stories that can't be proven to be 100% true ( i.e. fiction , as well ) .
These super fanatical ,...
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Okay , I am REALLY getting tired of all the drama going on about "The Passion Of The Christ" . People are acting like it's the end of the freakin' world . It's a MOVIE ( a fictional work) about a bunch of stories that can't be proven to be 100% true ( i.e. fiction , as well ) .
These super fanatical ,...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
hastwothumbs:
Being able to think for myself, sure. Being able to tell the difference between reality and fiction... that's a little iffy. 
You're not the only one who doesn't look good in the uniforms, though. I went to the Star Trek Experience show here and none of the actors looked good in their uniforms. There's just something about them that makes them look really bad in person.
Klingons are overrated, anyway. Right after Cardassians, Romulans are my second favorite race. They've got all the good qualities of Vulcans, only they enjoy kicking ass. I don't understand why more people don't like them.
You're not the only one who doesn't look good in the uniforms, though. I went to the Star Trek Experience show here and none of the actors looked good in their uniforms. There's just something about them that makes them look really bad in person.
Klingons are overrated, anyway. Right after Cardassians, Romulans are my second favorite race. They've got all the good qualities of Vulcans, only they enjoy kicking ass. I don't understand why more people don't like them.
linz:
please explain.
REPENT!!!! THE END IS NIGH!!!!! 
MVP 2 ?????
I don't know which is worse...The fact that somebody came up with the idea to make a movie about a chimp that plays hockey , or the fact that they made a friggin' SEQUEL about a hockey playing chimp who SKATEBOARDS!!!!!
Now I'll be the first to say that I LOVED "B.J. and the Bear" when I...
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MVP 2 ?????
I don't know which is worse...The fact that somebody came up with the idea to make a movie about a chimp that plays hockey , or the fact that they made a friggin' SEQUEL about a hockey playing chimp who SKATEBOARDS!!!!!
Now I'll be the first to say that I LOVED "B.J. and the Bear" when I...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
clara:
Doesn't it snow even more there than it does here? If anything I'll head south.
consuela:
well, thats just goes to reinforce how dumb we thought kids were!
i think i'd rather have a monkey.
i think i'd rather have a monkey.
Okay . I'm less bitter today now that V-Day is gone for another year , so I decided to change my "angry" journal . I still wish that I had a "Tommy Gun " though .
It's not necessarily for gunning down annoying PEOPLE ( Although there ARE plenty of them out there that need it ) , but for "Squirly Huntin' " . Why...
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It's not necessarily for gunning down annoying PEOPLE ( Although there ARE plenty of them out there that need it ) , but for "Squirly Huntin' " . Why...
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VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
cereal_killer:
i don't know you have to watch out for the squirrels in the city too... not only does the pollution mutate them, but they've started wearing gang colors now... i'm frightened for my life some days.
hastwothumbs:
A job that requires or even lets me dress up in funny outfits is what I'm aiming for.
But a job that pays me to fly in a funny outfit? HEAVEN.
But a job that pays me to fly in a funny outfit? HEAVEN.
FUCK VALENTINE'S DAY!!!!!
This message brought to you by the "Bitter Single People Of America" .
You know how they say that people become more suicidal around Christmas ? I'm betting people become more HOMICIDAL during Valentine's Day . All of the lovey dovey , sappy-ass , romantic bullshit makes me want to kill EVERYBODY around me . Even when I had a girlfriend for...
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This message brought to you by the "Bitter Single People Of America" .
You know how they say that people become more suicidal around Christmas ? I'm betting people become more HOMICIDAL during Valentine's Day . All of the lovey dovey , sappy-ass , romantic bullshit makes me want to kill EVERYBODY around me . Even when I had a girlfriend for...
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clara:
I'm glad you're enjoying the day so much. Did you notice it's almost wedding season?
I just read the Newsweek article about the new Mel Gibson movie " The Passion Of Christ "( I personally find it far more entertaining to refer to this movie as "The Gospel According To Martin Riggs" , the badass gun blasting kung fu-ing supercop from the Lethal Weapon movies ) about the final days of Jesus . The article is about " Who Really...
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VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
linz:
did you watch the simpsons the other day when homer told lisa to grow a penis and she just sat there grunting and like..trying to grow a penis! it was hilarious!
hastwothumbs:
Hey, I know Vic Farelli. Ol' "Vegas Vic," we call him. I met him while playing roulette with some hookers that gave me drugs they got from mobsters. Nice guy, real class act.
But the odds it was Professor Plum got bumped up to 7,658-1 yesterday. Turns out he tested positive for steroids.
But the odds it was Professor Plum got bumped up to 7,658-1 yesterday. Turns out he tested positive for steroids.
It's new all over. Take a look at the boards.
Re: rednecks
My brother has a rebel flag tattoo, the concept of which was stolen from an AC/DC album cover.
And even then it was iffy.