The other day my friend told me that her 4 year old nephew liked beer . He would always go around and ask people at parties if he could have a sip of their drink . This got me to thinking ( And we all know how dangerous THAT can be 
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Why don't we lower the legal drinking age to FOUR ? I know you're thinking " Is this guy fucking NUTS???? " Well , yeah...but that has no influence on this particular discussion . Think about it . If you start drinking at four , by the time you're twenty one you'd be a fully accomplished drinker . You wouldn't have those horrible times in college when you can't go to class and do your work 'cause you're still sick from the night before . THOSE moments would come in kindergarten when you don't really have to pay attention anyway . Hell , they even give you NAP TIME to sleep off your hangover . AWSOME!!!! Plus , you'd still have twelve years or so before you could drive , so that would drastically reduce drinking and driving accidents . Of course the number of fatal "Power Wheels" accidents would shoot up astronomically . A fair trade off , I say . Best of all , you could kill off the brain cells that house those embarassing childhood memories like shitting in your own pants or when your older sister and her sleepover friends abducted you and put make-up all over your face . Who needs THOSE memories ? That will leave only healthy and strong brain cells to suck up knowledge in your later years , when you REALLY need them .
This is a GOOD idea , people . Let's call our congressmen or women and get the ball rolling . I have a dream to have the streets teeming with drunken toddlers by 2006 . VIVA LA ALCOHOL!!!!
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Why don't we lower the legal drinking age to FOUR ? I know you're thinking " Is this guy fucking NUTS???? " Well , yeah...but that has no influence on this particular discussion . Think about it . If you start drinking at four , by the time you're twenty one you'd be a fully accomplished drinker . You wouldn't have those horrible times in college when you can't go to class and do your work 'cause you're still sick from the night before . THOSE moments would come in kindergarten when you don't really have to pay attention anyway . Hell , they even give you NAP TIME to sleep off your hangover . AWSOME!!!! Plus , you'd still have twelve years or so before you could drive , so that would drastically reduce drinking and driving accidents . Of course the number of fatal "Power Wheels" accidents would shoot up astronomically . A fair trade off , I say . Best of all , you could kill off the brain cells that house those embarassing childhood memories like shitting in your own pants or when your older sister and her sleepover friends abducted you and put make-up all over your face . Who needs THOSE memories ? That will leave only healthy and strong brain cells to suck up knowledge in your later years , when you REALLY need them .
This is a GOOD idea , people . Let's call our congressmen or women and get the ball rolling . I have a dream to have the streets teeming with drunken toddlers by 2006 . VIVA LA ALCOHOL!!!!
linz:
you know, i'm usually with you but i think i'm going to have to pass on this one.
clara:
It's a good thing I know you're joking, pal. 