When I have too much time on my hands at work I tend to let my mind slip into a REALLY bizarre place . It is this bizarre place that gives me most of my warped ideas that I share with all of you . Some people have their "Happy Place " , I have my "Bizarre Place" . It's but one of the many things that makes me me .
Todays thought of the day is about sharks . I was thinking about this show that I watched on the Discovery channel about great white sharks and shark attacks on humans . I've already talked at great length about my thoughts on people who are shocked about how often people get attacked by sharks in the oceans of the world . It is on a par with a hamburger expressing its shock about its friend getting eaten after it walked into McDonalds . You go in the ocean , you're part of the menu . PERIOD . I think that I may have come up with an idea that will be able to save thousands of lives from shark attacks though...or at the very least make the attacks more exciting for those watching from the beach . The idea is for those intrepid marine biologists who study sharks and tag them with tracking beacons . I would like to slightly modify those beacons with a satellite receiver and a small underwater amplifier . Now what happens is that a satellite or possibly several satellites which are circling the Earth from outer space will transmit a sound that will be picked up by the tag on the shark and the amplifier will then transmit that sound . Water is an excellent conductor and the sound will travel a good distance from the roaving predator to be heard by foolish swimmers who are out splashing about in the surf like wounded seals . What sound will the sharks be broadcasting you may ask ? Why the theme from Jaws , of course . Nothing will get your silly ass out of the ocean faster than that familiar blood curdling tune . The great part is that hopefully people on the beach can hear the noise too and as it gets louder/closer to the terrified swimmer they can accurately place bets on that person's survival . See , it's helpful for YOU the swimmer and fun for US the people who are safely on the beach . Genius ? No , I'm just a regular ordinary average Joe who likes to win money off of slow swimmers . Besides , sharks gotta' eat too , you know .
This message is brought to you by TinfoilHalo's Entertainment for the Ridiculously Deranged , or T.E.R.D. ( Pronounced Turd ) for short . Our motto is " Enjoy T.E.R.D. Everything else is just crap . "
Todays thought of the day is about sharks . I was thinking about this show that I watched on the Discovery channel about great white sharks and shark attacks on humans . I've already talked at great length about my thoughts on people who are shocked about how often people get attacked by sharks in the oceans of the world . It is on a par with a hamburger expressing its shock about its friend getting eaten after it walked into McDonalds . You go in the ocean , you're part of the menu . PERIOD . I think that I may have come up with an idea that will be able to save thousands of lives from shark attacks though...or at the very least make the attacks more exciting for those watching from the beach . The idea is for those intrepid marine biologists who study sharks and tag them with tracking beacons . I would like to slightly modify those beacons with a satellite receiver and a small underwater amplifier . Now what happens is that a satellite or possibly several satellites which are circling the Earth from outer space will transmit a sound that will be picked up by the tag on the shark and the amplifier will then transmit that sound . Water is an excellent conductor and the sound will travel a good distance from the roaving predator to be heard by foolish swimmers who are out splashing about in the surf like wounded seals . What sound will the sharks be broadcasting you may ask ? Why the theme from Jaws , of course . Nothing will get your silly ass out of the ocean faster than that familiar blood curdling tune . The great part is that hopefully people on the beach can hear the noise too and as it gets louder/closer to the terrified swimmer they can accurately place bets on that person's survival . See , it's helpful for YOU the swimmer and fun for US the people who are safely on the beach . Genius ? No , I'm just a regular ordinary average Joe who likes to win money off of slow swimmers . Besides , sharks gotta' eat too , you know .
This message is brought to you by TinfoilHalo's Entertainment for the Ridiculously Deranged , or T.E.R.D. ( Pronounced Turd ) for short . Our motto is " Enjoy T.E.R.D. Everything else is just crap . "
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
Oh, brilliant idea about the shark detectors. Sorry, I have nothing clever to say. I am mush