"I would only believe in a god that knew how to dance!" (Friedrich Nietzsche)
Wah, my last entry was from October? Gotta update... Not much to tell, though. Life still sucks beyond description. Okay, I guess I'm better off that many people. But I'm still miserable. Knowing how ungrateful that is makes me even more miserable. Nice feedback loop, that!
Worst of all... I fell in love again. Let my guard down for a second, thought she was "just" a friend. Yeah, well. Now I can again listen to a girl whine about the men who treat her like shit, knowing I'll never have her because I don't.
If I don't tell her how I feel about her, my head's going to explode. If do tell her, I'll ruin a perfectly good friendship. Skylla and Charybdis, here I go again. Well, I practically did tell her. But she either had no clue I was talking about her or she's extremely good at ignoring it. In the latter case, she must be rather cruel, treating me so nice, making me feel so welcome. But I guess she's just being friendly.... to a man who's "harmless", whom she'd never think of as interesting in more than a nice friendly sense....
I have, by the way, no idea why you're still reading this. If you want boring, watch some TV for the gods' sake!
now listening to: The Meteors, Hymns for the Hellbound
Wah, my last entry was from October? Gotta update... Not much to tell, though. Life still sucks beyond description. Okay, I guess I'm better off that many people. But I'm still miserable. Knowing how ungrateful that is makes me even more miserable. Nice feedback loop, that!
Worst of all... I fell in love again. Let my guard down for a second, thought she was "just" a friend. Yeah, well. Now I can again listen to a girl whine about the men who treat her like shit, knowing I'll never have her because I don't.
If I don't tell her how I feel about her, my head's going to explode. If do tell her, I'll ruin a perfectly good friendship. Skylla and Charybdis, here I go again. Well, I practically did tell her. But she either had no clue I was talking about her or she's extremely good at ignoring it. In the latter case, she must be rather cruel, treating me so nice, making me feel so welcome. But I guess she's just being friendly.... to a man who's "harmless", whom she'd never think of as interesting in more than a nice friendly sense....
I have, by the way, no idea why you're still reading this. If you want boring, watch some TV for the gods' sake!
now listening to: The Meteors, Hymns for the Hellbound
@ was Du heute morgen bei Gute Morgen SGgermany geschrieben hast: das kenne ich.
Bei mir ist z. Z. ein bisschen anders, in dem ich nicht mehr Kummer habe (wird schon wieder -- kommt immer wieder zurueck), aber immer noch schlimm ist es, in dem das Maedel mit dem ich zusammen bin weit weg ist--das tut auch weh.
Aber eines, das mir waehrend den letzte Woche hier in Trier sehr viel gehoelfen hat: einfach zwei schoene Freundinnen (auf kein Fall die Geliebte!) mitnehmen, und in Kieler Pumpe odere in einen andere Club eine Tanzflaesche finden und einfach super hard super lang tanzen, bis Du nicht mehr kannst. Naechste Woche: wiederholen. Die Geliebte so wenig wie moeglich sehen.
Das loest sich langsam ab. dauert ein bisschen aber das loest sich ab...