soooo... idk. i'm feeling iffy. life is getting the best of me lately. i'm really trying to hang in there though... i feel like i really need a vacation from my life for a month or so. i'm getting one in May for 5 days, i'm going to Colorado to visit my BFF kimmie which i'm super exited about, but i wish it was longer.
this summer is really not going to be very restful either. i'm really trying to figure out my schedule so i can keep and work all my jobs, but there isn't going to be much me time. i'm going to be working 2 nanny jobs, possibly a few weeks of summer school, and still trying to fit in lane bryant, because i really love working there (and the discount, lol).
i'm just feeling really lost lately... like, is this really what i want to do with the rest of my life? i pretty much have 3 jobs and i'm still broke as all fuck. i don't even make enough to move out again yet. i love my jobs. this is the first time ever that i've really been happy where i work, but i'm not making squat and this economy is shit. i've opened an etsy shop in hopes to make some extra cash, but i hardly ever have time to make anything to sell because i'm always at one of my other jobs or so exhausted by the time i get home i don't want to do anything.
i want to be a super woman. i want to be able to do it all.. but maybe thats not really feasible. on top of that i've been thinking about sam and me. i really love him, but he's poor too. if we ever decided to take the leap into forever, we'd always be trying to scrape by. which honestly i'm ok with. i love him and i know we'd find some way to get by, but financial issues are the #1 reason couples have problems.i guess i'm just wondering when something is going to give... i wish i had all the answers because i hate feeling so lost.
i guess the bottom line is that there maybe isn't an answer. i love what i do, and i love the people i work with. so that should matter more than being broke, right? being happy is definitely more important to me than money. but if i am going to have the future i am imagining for myself, marriage and kids someday, i'm going to have to have a more stable fiscal situation.
on top of all that stress, my parents are meeting sam on friday for the first time... any advice?
some good news:
my BFF rania had her baby last saturday. he's so sweet and tiny. his name is Ian and i want to steal him, lol.
i think this is all part of why i'm stressing. i want what she has. a husband, a house, and a baby. i want that. i know i'm totally not ready for that yet... but i want it. and really, i'm an only child and i'm used to getting what i want. lol
this summer is really not going to be very restful either. i'm really trying to figure out my schedule so i can keep and work all my jobs, but there isn't going to be much me time. i'm going to be working 2 nanny jobs, possibly a few weeks of summer school, and still trying to fit in lane bryant, because i really love working there (and the discount, lol).
i'm just feeling really lost lately... like, is this really what i want to do with the rest of my life? i pretty much have 3 jobs and i'm still broke as all fuck. i don't even make enough to move out again yet. i love my jobs. this is the first time ever that i've really been happy where i work, but i'm not making squat and this economy is shit. i've opened an etsy shop in hopes to make some extra cash, but i hardly ever have time to make anything to sell because i'm always at one of my other jobs or so exhausted by the time i get home i don't want to do anything.
i want to be a super woman. i want to be able to do it all.. but maybe thats not really feasible. on top of that i've been thinking about sam and me. i really love him, but he's poor too. if we ever decided to take the leap into forever, we'd always be trying to scrape by. which honestly i'm ok with. i love him and i know we'd find some way to get by, but financial issues are the #1 reason couples have problems.i guess i'm just wondering when something is going to give... i wish i had all the answers because i hate feeling so lost.
i guess the bottom line is that there maybe isn't an answer. i love what i do, and i love the people i work with. so that should matter more than being broke, right? being happy is definitely more important to me than money. but if i am going to have the future i am imagining for myself, marriage and kids someday, i'm going to have to have a more stable fiscal situation.
on top of all that stress, my parents are meeting sam on friday for the first time... any advice?
some good news:
my BFF rania had her baby last saturday. he's so sweet and tiny. his name is Ian and i want to steal him, lol.
i think this is all part of why i'm stressing. i want what she has. a husband, a house, and a baby. i want that. i know i'm totally not ready for that yet... but i want it. and really, i'm an only child and i'm used to getting what i want. lol
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I am going to FL in a few weeks and when I get back I am planning a trip to Indy.. We WILL be hanging and I shall be loving on you.. haha