remind me why i keep fucking men who are comeplete retards. please. i really want to know.
so like, last night the guy i have on occasions been playing hide the sausage with came over. i started cooking dinner and he sat on the couch doing nothing. then he stood up and said he was going for a walk. fine. the others arrived and dinner...
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so like, last night the guy i have on occasions been playing hide the sausage with came over. i started cooking dinner and he sat on the couch doing nothing. then he stood up and said he was going for a walk. fine. the others arrived and dinner...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
last ngiht i went to a squat party held by lesbians dressed like ocean suicides.
there were also a shameless amont of women dressed like pirates and men dressed like sailors.
like a dog with tow tails, i didnt know what one to wag.
i flirted with a girl called liz for a while. ewan compared it to pedophiles "groooming".
i meant the new flatmate...
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there were also a shameless amont of women dressed like pirates and men dressed like sailors.
like a dog with tow tails, i didnt know what one to wag.
i flirted with a girl called liz for a while. ewan compared it to pedophiles "groooming".
i meant the new flatmate...
Read More
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
filmguy79:
lol...dying in a kaftan eh? well, that sounds like a great idea for a photo set... 
mjollnir:
My cat just came home smelling like cigarettes. I am worried.
I hope you're back. Weekends in the country = scary.
I hope you're back. Weekends in the country = scary.
i made friends with the fire men next door last night! woohoo! i asked one of them for a lighter and he wa slike "what?" and i mmimed lighting my cigarette and he was like "you want a glass of water?" and i was like "hell no! i wanna smoke" and he was like, "we only got walker" and i nearly cried and he produced...
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sinope:
fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrremen! 
now that my friend sounds like a cool evening is to be had!
How ya doing anyway?
Sin xx
fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrremen!
now that my friend sounds like a cool evening is to be had!
How ya doing anyway?
Sin xx
badrobot:
Firemen rock; I went on a stag do with a friend of mine who is a firemen and they know how to have a good time (and the helmet is a fannymagnet!)
a girl worte a poem about my ass. a stranger from the far corners of LJ.
she wrote this:
Subject: an ode to sara's arse
1. the Arse, smooth like a ping-pong ball; it passes through the firewall
and seems to soar out of the void; a soft and silken ellipsoid.
then fairy lights enkindle it, like gossamer by candle lit, until it
glows beyond...
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she wrote this:
Subject: an ode to sara's arse
1. the Arse, smooth like a ping-pong ball; it passes through the firewall
and seems to soar out of the void; a soft and silken ellipsoid.
then fairy lights enkindle it, like gossamer by candle lit, until it
glows beyond...
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VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
nonchalance:
You think i need a poem to know how great the arse is? 
Yours especially. *schomooves louchely*
Yours especially.
*schomooves louchely*
castigate:
all of those thoughts can go through my mind in seconds.
but i can't communicate them quite so well.
but i can't communicate them quite so well.
so, yesterday i was on my way home from work in rush hour traffic and the tube was hot and stinky and some horrible woman gave me a dirty dirty look on the tube when i stomped on her toe with my chunky heals. HELLO!!!! im not the one wearing fucken open toes shoes on the fucken tube at god damn 5:30pm!
stupid bitch. i...
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stupid bitch. i...
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VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
dingoes8:
If someone's wearing open-toed shoes, they don't get my sympathy. That's the price they pay for putting fashion over functionality. 
mjollnir:
Hello! I got your postcard today. love you! mwah!
VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
fromthissoil:
I have no idea what punting is, and that picture doesn't help me. But hey, I bet it's fun!
meekesh:
sorry 
i'd really like to, but going to my friend's bbq, haven't seen her in ages. it starts rediculously early in the afternoon. have you got time during the week maybe? 
i'd really like to, but going to my friend's bbq, haven't seen her in ages. it starts rediculously early in the afternoon. have you got time during the week maybe? last night i got my name on the door in both of the clubs i went to. i then got drunk and kissed neil behind the DJ booth. he got me a +1. i like neil. i like people whos names are also verbs. it pleases me.
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
badrobot:
Damn! Well, you could shorten my name to Stu, if that helps 
asp40:
What sort of a verb is to "neil"?
It's not in my dictionary!
My middle name is a verb, it's Pedantic.
It's not in my dictionary!
My middle name is a verb, it's Pedantic.
today i tried to go skinnnydipping with a lovely group of ladies and couldnt because vandals ruined the ladies pond for everyone. cunts. if i find out who did it im gonna kill them.
instead we just went regular swimming, but with pimms and wine.
instead we just went regular swimming, but with pimms and wine.
VIEW 22 of 22 COMMENTS
filmme:
I am... beaming.
gramsci:
kia ora
N? ?tautahi ahau
and you?
and what's wrong with tan lines?
N? ?tautahi ahau
and you?
and what's wrong with tan lines?
this morning i did the walk of shame home in my party dress after spending an evening in zone three!
zone three! the middle of no where!
and i lost all my money on a black jack
table in camden.
anyway, im walking home in my party dress, last nights make up, with three hickies on my neck. eww ewww ewww.
im unhappy and more...
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zone three! the middle of no where!
and i lost all my money on a black jack
table in camden.
anyway, im walking home in my party dress, last nights make up, with three hickies on my neck. eww ewww ewww.
im unhappy and more...
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VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
pommyjeff:
what happened? you ok?
Zone 3 sucks ass.
Zone 3 sucks ass.
sherman_tank1:
the next days walk home is a little longer then the one you took to get there..
fucken hell god damn. you wouldnt believe it. i live in brixton but i have to go to south kensington to get my wallet stolen! what a stupid and crazy world it is.
fucken chavs!
also, fucken robin! it was totally his fault! and notmine at all.
first day of work was good. mt boss is a drunken toff who doesnt know what im doing....
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fucken chavs!
also, fucken robin! it was totally his fault! and notmine at all.
first day of work was good. mt boss is a drunken toff who doesnt know what im doing....
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VIEW 18 of 18 COMMENTS
nickolai:
Wow, you've never been to a meet either. So friday is your first one too, I didn't know.
They seem like a nice enough bunch don't they.
I just want to make sure that when I go to the meets that I actually enjoy it and feel comfy enough to be myself and have fun. I've met so many cool people on here though, that I definitely want to meet them for real, sooner or later.
They seem like a nice enough bunch don't they.
I just want to make sure that when I go to the meets that I actually enjoy it and feel comfy enough to be myself and have fun. I've met so many cool people on here though, that I definitely want to meet them for real, sooner or later.
anton:
I hate wallets going anywhere. And in the hands of a bastard thief is one of the dumber places they can go.
And dude, show me the real London. Cheers!
And dude, show me the real London. Cheers!
That sounded like MANGUYS in my head. like manguise is one word. heehee.
Seriously though, no good. I figure if you're making dinner and entertaining guests, you deserve a little more respect.