I feel like a complete and total dick today.
After Halloween, the girl in orange County I have a crush on has been haunting my thoughts. I like her, I know she likes me, but she's in the process of trying to make the other guy she's been dating on and off understand she can only be friends with him. He was cool with it at first, but now he's being a little psycho-bitch and constantly begging her to be with him. She doesn't want to slam the door on him, and lose even the friendship, so in the meantime, until she gets that sorted out, I'm in limbo. But I really want to focus my attention on this girl, so I had to tell the two girls I'd been occasionally seeing that I wanted to just be friends so I could concentrate voluntarily on just the one. Karen was cool with it, and thanked me for my honesty. I hadn't ever kissed her, so it wasn't that big of a move to just being friends anyway. Kimberly on the other hand I had made out with. I told her today that I wanted to not date anymore, and see if she could be a friend, as I wanted to be exclusive (at least from my end) with Kristen in OC. She was obviously hurt, and said she didn't want to even hang out anymore, as she would wind up getting hurt even more. I feel like such a shit-heel having to do that. I had to be honest, hopefully she realized I had to tell her before I saw her again, as I couldn't go out with one girl while thinking of another. I just feel like such a major asshole! I hurt someone's feelings and ruined their Saturday. I wish there were an easier way to do that, without taking the chickenshit path of ignoring her, or leaving the news in an email. We were just starting to see each other, we hadn't slept together or anything, but I still feel like a cretin today...
I don't even know for sure if things will end up working with Kristen anyway, so I may be burning bridges prematurely. I just can't fuction the way other guys do though, and play multiple hands at once. My life would probably be a lot easier if I could.
After Halloween, the girl in orange County I have a crush on has been haunting my thoughts. I like her, I know she likes me, but she's in the process of trying to make the other guy she's been dating on and off understand she can only be friends with him. He was cool with it at first, but now he's being a little psycho-bitch and constantly begging her to be with him. She doesn't want to slam the door on him, and lose even the friendship, so in the meantime, until she gets that sorted out, I'm in limbo. But I really want to focus my attention on this girl, so I had to tell the two girls I'd been occasionally seeing that I wanted to just be friends so I could concentrate voluntarily on just the one. Karen was cool with it, and thanked me for my honesty. I hadn't ever kissed her, so it wasn't that big of a move to just being friends anyway. Kimberly on the other hand I had made out with. I told her today that I wanted to not date anymore, and see if she could be a friend, as I wanted to be exclusive (at least from my end) with Kristen in OC. She was obviously hurt, and said she didn't want to even hang out anymore, as she would wind up getting hurt even more. I feel like such a shit-heel having to do that. I had to be honest, hopefully she realized I had to tell her before I saw her again, as I couldn't go out with one girl while thinking of another. I just feel like such a major asshole! I hurt someone's feelings and ruined their Saturday. I wish there were an easier way to do that, without taking the chickenshit path of ignoring her, or leaving the news in an email. We were just starting to see each other, we hadn't slept together or anything, but I still feel like a cretin today...
I don't even know for sure if things will end up working with Kristen anyway, so I may be burning bridges prematurely. I just can't fuction the way other guys do though, and play multiple hands at once. My life would probably be a lot easier if I could.
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I am so sick of Antioch. I wanted to share my dislike and the fact that it all around sucks.
#1. The stupid traffic and road construction.
#2. The horrible selection of bars. Anything decent is in Walnut Creek or SF. I don't feel like driving that far, and then having to take a cab home because everyone else refuses to be the DD.
#3. Cold Stone is way too far from my house.
Okay that is enough. I felt like bitching. I feel better.
Oh, and that really sucks about your crush. I think every girl has been in that position one time or another. It's been years for me, having some guy being creepy like that. I want to keep it that way.
What you did with Kimberly was right though. Keeping her around would have been like she was a side dish. So breaking it off early was goodon your part, even if you feel like a "shit-heel".