Saw her last night. We went into San Francisco to see a movie and have some drinks. It's hard to believe it'd been 3 months since I'd seen her. We talk and write constantly, but I haven't seen her eyes, or the way her nose crinkles when she thinks I'm nuts. Of course, now she's back with HIM. I want to keep seeing her as that awesome friend... and I hoped that I would feel different about it. I'm not going to lie to myself, I'm not going to lie to her. I don't want to break up anyone's relationship (been on the receiving end of that bullshit too many times) but I told her I'm still crazy about her. I'd blame the martinis, but they weren't even that strong. She gave me a hug and I had to fight and keep myself from kissing her neck, her ear brushed against my cheek, and I staggered backwards. Damn it! Why does she have to be so wonderful? She knows how I feel.. She doesn't discourage it, she doesn't lead me on, she just keeps being my friend. It's SO hard, but I love her company too much to run away... It didn't help that she looked amazing as well... AArrrggh! 