thisisalladream

i think it might be a part of the human condition to constantly think that there is something wrong with you own person. although this could also just be me making an attempt to quiet my mind and make me feel slightly better.

i've been having these days more often than not.

i feel bumbling, unsure of my life, and numb. the last one is truly getting to me. i've always been fairly indecisive which simply does not help in these situations. i'm not sure what it is i want. here or there. then or now. all i end up doing to squelch the squealing in head is close my eyes tightly and hope that the create some sort of "guarantee machine."

now offering you a glimpse into the future to help answer life's' more troublesome questions. calm those worries, banish those fears, we'll show you how for just seven payments of $19.99...

however expensive, right this second, i would take a chance on it, just so i could know which path i am suppose to be taking. no second guessing myself. no overwhelming panic setting in, not being afraid of what might happen or what might come. i realize there are no "real" guarantees in life (yes, yes, *other* than death and taxes) but just this one time can't someone, anyone really, tell me what i am suppose to be doing?

my heart, head, hands, and sanity simply can't decide amongst themselves and at some point i am really going to need to get some sleep.