thirtyseven

i've had a reader request for an update..and i have just been informed that said reader is getting married next saturday. w-o-w.

i bought my ticket for disneyland tonight.

AND i found my diary from seventh grade tonight, in which i admitted to being "boy crazy" and listed the seven boys i currently had crushes on. i also called myself fat and said i almost weighed 99 pounds. that is just devastating to me. at that point in my life, there had never been the slightest rumor that some boy liked me.. much less had i had my first kiss (it seemed like everone else had), or, for god's sake .. a boyfriend. so i thought i was horribly unattractive and fat at less than 99 pounds. life really, really sucks for a lot of girls. and yeah, at that point in life, i think it's okay to only blame outside forces and not myself for not being "strong enough to see my beauty"

i took a class on race, gender and the media with my favorite professer ever. as an aside, i almost didn't because her name was radhika parameswaran and that intimidated me .. anyway, for our final proejct we could do a proejct on ANYTHING having to do with race and/or gender and the media. i really, really wanted to do something about the impact of, say, seventeen magazine on 11-13 year old girls. i would get much more specific than that, of course, because that's pretty obvious .. but you get my point. anyway, we were assigned groups and my group was led by an outgoing (as in she just left) sorority president who already had a job lined up doing PR work for the atlanta falcons. obviously she took charge. so we did our project on the representation of african-americans in african-american family dramas released in the 90s. think soul food and when stella got her grove back and waiting eo exhale. pfft. don't care. another group compared audrey hepburn and katherine hepburn.

speaking of, do you ever stop and think about the fact that katherine hepburn is still alive? because i do. and if you do too, that will REALLY impress me. i've probably told this before, but i suddenly decided i liked my boyfriend because he told me that sometimes he thinks about butros butros-gali, which is something that i do .. and i never thought anyone else did. so yeah, you let me know. mickey rooney also applies here, but not as much because he's just odd. and round.

anyway .. this has been a lot of writing. i hope i satisfied the request.

ok, a couple more things: the two things that made me cry yesterday wrere seeing snippets of that concert for america (the good one last year, not the one this year with enrique) and seeing how a huge portion of the audience was holding up photographs of their loved ones who died. and they were both smiling and crying and swaying with their pictures held over their hearts while listening to paul mccartney singing 'let it be." and, you know, these are some tough guys in the audience. not just tough, but NEWYORKTOUGH. big, burly, mustached (but not gay) men just weeping.

(breathe..)

and the second thing that really got to me was seeing the hbo documentary (i hadn't seen it before) that showed the bodies falling from thw wtc towers. i did a paper on that issue for my journalism ethics class and researched it. telemundo was the only station to repeatedly show any of that footage on or after the 11th. for some reason that doesn't surprise me. anyway, i'm glad i had never seen it before. that was killer. oh .. and if you saw it .. the shot from the police helicopter of the person waving a white towel around from out of a window above where one of the planes hit. heartbreaking.

enough of that. it was a beautiful day yesterday.