soooo its time to blog... i think this one is gonna be on the negative side. mostly cuz i don't have anyone to share things with. i have family and great roommates. No one/no friends to complain to, or share victory with. My phone goes unheard not because its on silence but because no one cares to see me, or invite me too... i don't have any legit friends...
there is a couple people that care for me outside of the home as i care for them. But i remember having friends back in school. Its not the same. i don't have that specific "i want to run wild through the night and into the morning." i remember the friendship where the question "are we hanging out today" is a question that never need be asked.
i missed this.. and i get depressed when i can go a whole day without looking at my phone or FB and have no change in status, no missed calls, nothing. It makes me feel like i don't even exist.
my hobbies are a bit out there... motorcycles and skydiving... i don't drink or anything... but there are tonz of sXe kids out there that seem to have packs of friends.. maybe they all go back.... Hell i have only been in austin for 6+ years now.
Even my work is against me. I have been a server there for 3 1/2 years and all i want is a bar position. There are kids way newer that have been put in the bar...
i cant afford skydiving until all my gear is purchased which is another $2000. My motorcycle got stolen over a year ago, and i have been trying to save money for another but my brother has all my money locked up (i helped him move and shit.)
i cant get any tattoos cuz im still trying to get another bike and skydive gear. my last girlfriend/ my last love broke my heart into pieces and i still hurt. It'll be a year since the break up at the end of November... I still hurt so so so bad. Not a day goes by where i don't think about her and how i miss and remember all the good, and then i hate on all the bad and the last few memories shared with her.
vie recently gotten into a bad sleeping habit and its affected my dieting and workouts. Im loosing what i have been working so hard for. Being up at 4:45am writing this blog is a good example.
i like being by myself, but i don't like being lonely. Im not happy at all really.
at least i can put on one hell of a fake smile... eh
there is a couple people that care for me outside of the home as i care for them. But i remember having friends back in school. Its not the same. i don't have that specific "i want to run wild through the night and into the morning." i remember the friendship where the question "are we hanging out today" is a question that never need be asked.
i missed this.. and i get depressed when i can go a whole day without looking at my phone or FB and have no change in status, no missed calls, nothing. It makes me feel like i don't even exist.
my hobbies are a bit out there... motorcycles and skydiving... i don't drink or anything... but there are tonz of sXe kids out there that seem to have packs of friends.. maybe they all go back.... Hell i have only been in austin for 6+ years now.
Even my work is against me. I have been a server there for 3 1/2 years and all i want is a bar position. There are kids way newer that have been put in the bar...
i cant afford skydiving until all my gear is purchased which is another $2000. My motorcycle got stolen over a year ago, and i have been trying to save money for another but my brother has all my money locked up (i helped him move and shit.)
i cant get any tattoos cuz im still trying to get another bike and skydive gear. my last girlfriend/ my last love broke my heart into pieces and i still hurt. It'll be a year since the break up at the end of November... I still hurt so so so bad. Not a day goes by where i don't think about her and how i miss and remember all the good, and then i hate on all the bad and the last few memories shared with her.
vie recently gotten into a bad sleeping habit and its affected my dieting and workouts. Im loosing what i have been working so hard for. Being up at 4:45am writing this blog is a good example.
i like being by myself, but i don't like being lonely. Im not happy at all really.
at least i can put on one hell of a fake smile... eh
_cupcake:
hahaha "bad sleeping habits" that are not really your choice btw. cheer up 
i still loves ya. you finished your 90 day thing, your healthy, fit, you have things you value in life. Do you really need other people around to share them?
i still loves ya. you finished your 90 day thing, your healthy, fit, you have things you value in life. Do you really need other people around to share them?
minks:
Im sorry that you are going through such a tough time. Since this was close to a month ago I am hoping things are looking up for you <3