theyerg

God i hate being fucking sick. the last 24 hours were hellacious. the last two nights in bed i was drenched in sweat. this morning i got out of bed and tried putting a bagel in the toaster to get something in my stomach since all i ate yesterday were some fries and some popcorn. half way to the kitchen i busted out in a cold sweat and got extremely dizzy. i laid on the linoleum in the fetal position for about ten minutes before i could get up. my back and abs are killing me from the spasms of coughing. i can feel the shit in my chest. i wish i could just cram my hand down my throat and scrape it all out. then just be done with this sick shit.
when my pop called today to check on me, it was a mix of sentiment and ass kicking. all i had to do was say the word and he was going to drive the 8 from PA to take care of me for the weekend. then i made the mistake of saying that i can feel the work piling up in my cube as i miss days. that led to him going off on one of his "a w-2 is not a marriage license" rants. but he is right. i need to get my mind and body back in good health. i just get so run down sometimes.
mom tore into me as weel tonight about the lifestyle. apparently i am not in college anymore and i can't go out to drink people under the table anymore. this is the second time i have been put down with sickness like this in a year. maybe it is time to start taking better care of myself. maybe its time to reclaim me.