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theretronerd

9 lightyears SW, turn left @ the indigo star

Member Since 2003

Followers 14 Following 14

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Monday May 10, 2004

May 9, 2004
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yeah! off to CLUTCH today. yeah ELoRPS...slow road to china, i know tongue i might have the pleasure of AmazonRed as a travel companion. shes undecided at this point but i hope she can come. i have a very cool shrit to wear. whoo hoo! hot pink fishnet tank top thingy and im wearin it over a black bra. ooh la la. ive never gone out publicly with my bra the show is at an industrial club and they always have fetish parties and stuff so its appropriate for the night.

i had a really fucked up two days. ouchie owie shit. my tummy is still hurting from all of it but i suppose its better in the end. right? thats what they tell me. better to find out now then later after i get more involved. basically i gave someone a bit of my heart. not much but a tiny piece and they threw it on the ground and spit on it. long story, more detials i wont reveal but interestingly i had a premonition about this. i had a vision crystal clear in my mind for a few days and it wasnt like anything i had seen before. i saw a bright color tattoo flash art image (ive never seen any tattoo like images before so...) of a white dove lying on its back, belly up with a sword through its chest and blood draining and staining the feathers around the wound. it upset me when i saw it and i didnt know what to make of it. funny how that is. damb. i wish i knew what the fucking things meant WHEN i actually got them. but oh well, things come as i come. i also smelled skunk around my house sat morning then saw a dead wild turkey. as you can see in my profile i have a thing for these animals. about two months ago while driving to work i saw right in a row a dead turkey and a dead skunk and i was like - FUCK! whats that about??? and also let me say that before this i NEVER saw turkeys in CT. i used to see tons in jersey but ive been here 3 years and i had maybe seen 2. so then this day i see my two totems dead. very soon after that the shit hit the fan. so when i saw the turkey sat i was afraid. afraid something bad was gonna happen again, that i was headed for rough times. well yeah, i had some this weekend. but later that afternoon (sat) i found a huge turtle dead on the road. now i dont know how to fix up a turtle like you skin a coyote or skunk or preserve feathers so i asked some friends. i learned that turtles REALLY stink so what i had to do was bury it. ill leave it there for months then dig it up and have a gorgeous turtle shell. im pretty sure the skull is intact too. the head wasnt damaged at all. so yeah! turtle skull as well. so i think the universe loves me very much. no, i dont think it. i know it. and the turtle was just a little gift, an affirmation saying 'youre ok mama, weve got your back' someone always does. i have more than a few friends in the angelic realm and i love them sooo much. id be super fucked without their guidance. THANKY YOU!!! trick for me is, i have to start trusting them more, listening to them, heeding the signs as they are given rather than putting my trust into people that arent safe. easier said than done but at least i recognize it.

love to everyone. and fuck yeah! CLUTCH!!!

'dont worry,
its just stigmata
pass me a napkin
and dont you dare tell my mother...'

:rocker:

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