Ladies & gentlemen...fuck it, who am i trying to kid?.. there's only ever one person who reads this shit...
Elysia! Behold what is possibly the most grotesque item of baby clothing ever created:
Elysia! Behold what is possibly the most grotesque item of baby clothing ever created:
Some 'friend' of my wifes gave us this. No doubt it had been given to her by a kind 'friend' along with the words 'oh its lovely but what a pity our Tarquin is too big for it now'. It's like a gay unicorn vomited after over-doing it on the mushrooms.
Our house is slowly becoming a dumping ground for other peoples baby shit.
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How can I even begin to describe the horror of that suit? How do you keep a straight face when someone gives you something so awful? Or is it someone that doesn't like you?
I'm thinking farmers, I'm thinking under-educated, possibly hand made by a blind old bearded lady with an evil streak?
If your house is a dumping ground for baby shit why do I not have your address? I seriously need to get round to ebaying a load of stuff as there is JUST TOO FUCKING MUCH of it.
I will make a point to look out for your "house" next time I'm up North