thenextksmith

I'm supposed to meet her at a Hooka bar tonight with a few friends.
As much as I want her, I do know that it's probably best to get over her and just move on. I keep seeing all these other beautiful women out there, but I can't approach them. I can't get the courage to talk to them. Partly because it's just been so long, and partly because I know that if something were to happen between them and I, Samantha would be out of the picture.

Tonight, I tell her everything. If she accepts it, then she'll dumb the guy and things'll change drastically. All for the better. If she says no, if she really does love him, then I'll have closure. And a damn good reason to drink that bottle of Stoli.

Also, why is it that I always seem to attract girls that are already with people? I'm really not that amazing. Okay, possibly, but I mean, I'm not in great shape. Not even in good shape. I could play the Michellin Man without any padding, but I always seem to attract the women in relationships. I hate being "that guy." The one asshole that broke up a relationship. (Yes I am fully aware of the fact that I'm hoping that I break up the relationship between Samantha and her guy, but that is aside from the point. She doesn't count.)

Ugh. I need to start swimming and get back in shape. Maybe that's all I really need. Just to get back in shape and get comfortable in my own skin again, start dating again...even so...I still need some sense of closure.

PS- Snakes on a Plane was amazing. Everyone should watch it as soon as humanly possible.