thelastasthmatic

taken from an old email:

pure in the sense that i am all she needs.no person or animal or plastic thing would ever take my place. however far apart and however long,i will always be the one in her heart. i will always be enough. i will always know how she feels.

i want someone to sleep with. it feels so good and warm to hold someone for the night,to kiss their head in the morning, and to look in their tired eyes and touch their frumpled hair and know that i love them.

i want to hold someone's hand. to feel the power of creation and the softness of love in their hand. i want their hands to touch me,to feel me, to know that i belong to them.

i want to belong with someone. not ownership;consent. i want to become with someone. i want balance.

christ,if i could sum it up in one word-balance.

my grandfather always talked about my grandmother after she was gone. he spoke of being with her again. he never wanted to remarry. he never wanted to leave his town,his land, his home. he only wanted her. i know he's with her now,i know he's happy. i want that kind of love and devotion,and i want home.

home.


also from that email:

i miss you,_____. though i don't know where i fit in your world of dancing,drugs,newborns,adult book stores,reincarnation,lesbians,and walmart.


how could i not garner such insight from such interesting relationships?