Life is scary. Life is strange. Life is funny. Life is beautiful.
Last week my grandmother passed away, and for the week leading up to her funeral I was in a state of shock. I was conflicted at my feelings over her passing. My grandma was a tough lady. She was totally old school in her beliefs. She was a devout Christian who never missed a day of church, and when I was growing up she was clear on her stance on the other races and other lifestyles (we couldn't watch Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, and nothing with homosexuals)
So needless to say, as I grew up and learned more of life, we constantly butted heads and had many heated arguments and painful disagreements. She was really concerned I was going to Hell ..and I was hurt by that.
But when she died and I got up to read the poem I wrote about her, a strange calm came over me.. and the poem I wrote stayed true to our relationship and also provided everyone in the funeral (it was packed) with some consolation. Because I realized how much my grandma loved me, and practically everyone she talked to knew about her grandson, the writer/poet... I really think she was my number one fan...and I am saddened to have realized that too late....and I regret never being able to patch things up, altho I understand that may not have been possible...
But I am amazed at how far I have grown in the past year... and I feel as if I have been reborn, and my eyes are open and I am finally living my life in a positive and healthy manner.
No, I didn't find God.
In fact, I gave up on God.
To be more precise, I gave up on everything I can't know. I wont say God doesn't exist...because I simply don't know... but I definitely know all religions are false and cause way more damage then they cause good... and any good we can get from religion, we can find elsewhere.
I absolutely love my life, and I truly feel blessed to have this "gift" with words.. It has always been my goal to use my gift for the benefit of others.. Because it is only logical to me that if I can help my fellow man, I will only be creating a better environment for myself and my loved ones...
Its my utmost hope that we can all wake up and start using our brains more and stop taking these "truths" for granted, such as religious texts. And I hope one day we can look back on religion with a kind of pity and disgust, the same way we do slavery. For even tho slavery created some impressive things (like the pyramids) it came at a terrible cost....
I am now, more than ever before, assured that I am on the right path with my writing. I know, at my core, I am a writer, and that will never change.
The more I discover of life, the more I love it. I want to meet as many people as I can. I want to see as much as I can. I love this world, and I love the people that inhabit it..
but I am so terribly afraid of losing it all because someone (or some group) thought it best to blow up everything for the promise of something they could never prove.....
That's enough for now...
Take Care Out There,
-Michael
ps: I'm sure I'll post a new poem soon, but until then, my myspace blog and my website have most of my poems... http://blogs.myspace.com/theinfamousmoocow and http://www.heartpress.net
Last week my grandmother passed away, and for the week leading up to her funeral I was in a state of shock. I was conflicted at my feelings over her passing. My grandma was a tough lady. She was totally old school in her beliefs. She was a devout Christian who never missed a day of church, and when I was growing up she was clear on her stance on the other races and other lifestyles (we couldn't watch Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, and nothing with homosexuals)
So needless to say, as I grew up and learned more of life, we constantly butted heads and had many heated arguments and painful disagreements. She was really concerned I was going to Hell ..and I was hurt by that.
But when she died and I got up to read the poem I wrote about her, a strange calm came over me.. and the poem I wrote stayed true to our relationship and also provided everyone in the funeral (it was packed) with some consolation. Because I realized how much my grandma loved me, and practically everyone she talked to knew about her grandson, the writer/poet... I really think she was my number one fan...and I am saddened to have realized that too late....and I regret never being able to patch things up, altho I understand that may not have been possible...
But I am amazed at how far I have grown in the past year... and I feel as if I have been reborn, and my eyes are open and I am finally living my life in a positive and healthy manner.
No, I didn't find God.
In fact, I gave up on God.
To be more precise, I gave up on everything I can't know. I wont say God doesn't exist...because I simply don't know... but I definitely know all religions are false and cause way more damage then they cause good... and any good we can get from religion, we can find elsewhere.
I absolutely love my life, and I truly feel blessed to have this "gift" with words.. It has always been my goal to use my gift for the benefit of others.. Because it is only logical to me that if I can help my fellow man, I will only be creating a better environment for myself and my loved ones...
Its my utmost hope that we can all wake up and start using our brains more and stop taking these "truths" for granted, such as religious texts. And I hope one day we can look back on religion with a kind of pity and disgust, the same way we do slavery. For even tho slavery created some impressive things (like the pyramids) it came at a terrible cost....
I am now, more than ever before, assured that I am on the right path with my writing. I know, at my core, I am a writer, and that will never change.
The more I discover of life, the more I love it. I want to meet as many people as I can. I want to see as much as I can. I love this world, and I love the people that inhabit it..
but I am so terribly afraid of losing it all because someone (or some group) thought it best to blow up everything for the promise of something they could never prove.....
That's enough for now...
Take Care Out There,
-Michael
ps: I'm sure I'll post a new poem soon, but until then, my myspace blog and my website have most of my poems... http://blogs.myspace.com/theinfamousmoocow and http://www.heartpress.net