thediz

so on wednesday i went to class and talk to one of my teachers about the project i'm doing. it seemed simple enought, but my mind wasn't wraping around it at all. i talked to my teacher about it and then we got into my life and she asked me when the last time i had fun was.... i didn't have an answer for her, i don't even know the last time i had fun. and at the point in the conversation i got a bit emotional. i didn't start crying or anything, but we bothe new i wanted to. i told her about all the shit i have to put up with and basically what's going on in my life right now and then she pretty much told me i need to find time to help myself and have some fun becasue i'm letting stress overwhelmed me and it's effecting my work.
so basically she said that the stress in my life is crushing my creativity.
i wanted to cry again at that point (but didn't). i already felt like i was losing my mind, now my creativity is going too. fuckin'eh. that blows. it's actually a really hard thing to hear.

on a lighter note... i got an interveiw on tuesday. hopefully i get the job. i think that will easeup a lot of stress. and then maybe i'll be able to afford to go out and have fun and get my brain in a good place.

...AND i still have to get rid of one of my dogs. i'd rather give her to one of my friends, cause then i'd know that she'd be taken care of, but i don't know if anyof my friends can have a dog right now. so i still need to find a rescue.

<5diz

oh, by the way...