thedarkness

This is a story that I encountered and thought you all might enjoy it.

Young men encounter many obstacles when trying to bed teenage girls, but this episode was out of the ordinary. I had a girlfriend at my house while my parents were out, and I put in three solid hours of smooth seduction while we watched Hot Shots! and its sequel, Hot Shots! Part Deux. She finally relented and there we wereon the floor in my living room, lights off, kissing passionately and clawing at each others bodies. It was hot. As I was unhooking her bra, my girlfriend unleashed a scream of pure horror. My Alzheimers-riddled grandma, who lives with my family, had entered the darkened living room. In her mentally addled state, she is often oblivious to anyone else who may be in the room. This time was no different. Thinking she was in her own room, she undressed and lay naked beside us on the floor. My date ran to her car; I carried Grandma to bed, sex-less.

A man is driving past a farm when he spots a pig with a wooden leg. Puzzled, he pulls over and approaches the farmer.
Whats the story with this pig? he asks.
That pig can recognize 100 different commands, work out math equations in the dirt and speak more than 50 words, the farmer says.
So whats with the wooden leg? the man asks.
When a pig is that special, the farmer replies, You just dont eat him all at once.



Not much to report, just slowly heading towards the end of school and a long break of family and video games.

Henshin a-Go-Go- baby