theconservative

it's getting real hard. i've never been the type to be depressed, but lately i've had several people as me what the problem is. like my mother-in-law(whom i love) for example, it's not like i can just tell her that we're splitting up and, oh, by the way, your daughter wants to be with women now. i've also felt like i've always had a healthy self esteem, but now i don't know. now i just don't feel like i can get anyone else. it's not fair that someone else can make you feel that way. maybe i just need someone to say, hey, you're a good looking guy, you're smart, you'll be fine. i just don't feel fine. i feel like the only thing i have is my daughter. sometimes i just want to take her and go, but i know i can't do that. and won't. i just look at her and think, this just isn't fair to her. she didn't ask to be born, much less ask for mommy to decide that she doesn't love daddy anymore. i just think to myself, what have i ever done to deserve this? i've always respected her, never raised my voice to her, always sacrificed for her, always supported her(hell, i put her through college), i've never lied to her(until all this started). i've always just been a good guy. and i guess good guys don't always finish first.