Time for a bit of a rant. This doesn't really apply to anyone here but I just need to type it somewhere.
So after telling people about my job, what I do at it, and my schedule they often say "Wow, you're lucky" too which I reply "Yes, I know I'm lucky to have a job and I'm extremely lucky that I enjoy it" to which they usually add "and you have so much free time, it must be nice". Ugh, that pisses me off. Fuck them. I work 40 hrs, just like most everyone else with a full time job. First of all, here is my schedule: I have a meeting I go to on Wednesday which is from 11-1, I go in Thursday from 6AM-10PM, I work Friday from 2PM-10PM, and I work Saturday from 8AM-10PM. So yes I have Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and most of Wednesday off. Yes, that's good and it is indeed great for potential mini vacations. But no, it's not any better or easier then any other schedule. First of all lets review who I work with. I work with societies throw-aways. I work with the kids who were beaten, raped, and psychological demeaned in ways most people could never comprehend. I work with kids who were raped by their grandfather, beat by their mom, forced as toddlers to watch their dad rape prostitutes or kill someone. I work with kids who find extreme ways to get the attention and subsequently the help they need. I work with kids who know pain and suffering to be a normal part of life. I love these kids. I would do anything to help them. I work with the kids most people wish would just go away so they don't have to hear their stories. I listen to those stories every day I go in to work. I go in Thursday morning at 6 AM until 10 PM. By then I'm so physically and especially emotionally drained I fall asleep within and hour and wake up around 10AM. I eat and shower, I help my grandfather around the house, and maybe get to the gym, and then have to head to work. I go in and lead shift (extra responsibilities). Fridays, suck. KIds are pissed because their piece-of-shit dad decided not to take them out for pass after they waited all week or because they can't because can't see their mom who is dying in the hospital because no one cares enough to give him a ride their. Usually somebody punches a hole in the wall, hurts themselves, or assaults someone. Then I go home and once again pass out in an hour. Saturday I do the same stuff for 14 hours, also I do grocery shopping for the program, and give rides to visit parents who don't have cars or whatever. I then go home and pass out. I have to be trained to restrain kids when they attack me or other staff, and yes this happens often. I have to know how to react to all the various methods of suicide or self harm someone may try. I cook, clean up, listen, advise, entertain, transport, tutor. I regularly clean up blood, tears, sweat, cum, and shit. Everyday I go in to work I know I could end up sitting in a hospital with a kid waiting for them to be admitted for long past my scheduled shift, sometimes a 8hr shift turns into a 16 hr shift and I have no option to say no, I can't tonight I have plans. I go in knowing I could be hurt. I've been kicked and punched I saw a co-worker hit with a chair. Yes, when you ask me about my job I don't tell you all the little details. Why would I want to talk about all this? Why would I want to think about it? I tell you I play video games and hang out with the kids. It's true I do, but that's a small part. But that's the part I want to think about when I'm not at work. Do you really want to hear about how I was attacked by a 13 year old girl who I found smashing her head into the wall and how it took three of us to restrain hair and she peed on me? Maybe you're a sick fuck and want to hear about how she does this because she was constantly raped by her grandfather, pimped out by her mom, and is forced by court order to take enough drugs to put most people into a coma. But do you really think that after dealing with that I want to talk about it with you? Maybe you understand what it's like, but most people don't. When I want to talk about it I talk with my boss or a co-worker of my friend who does the same thing. They understand, they know when it's OK to laugh, they understand sometimes to just shut up when you tear up and give you a hug. Back to the point though, yes I have three days off. But no I don't have anymore free time then you. I go to work and have next to no time to de-stress before the next day. You might work 5 days a week, but remember you go in at 9 and get out at 5 or whatever and have time every night to de-stress. So I have three days straight to de-stress, but just think maybe that's necessary after not being able to between shifts. Maybe just like you sometimes wish you had three days off I sometimes wish I could come home and relax for a whole night in-between days of work. Don't get me wrong. I am by no means trying to argue the opposite, I don't think your schedule is any better or worse then mine. They both have their pros and cons. I suppose like they say, the grass is always greener on the other side.
I am not looking for sympathy or praise for what I do. I am not suggesting my job is any tougher then yours. I could likely never do your job. It would be torturous to work in an office. I couldn't run into a fire and save anyone. I would go insane being someone's bitch in retail. I have all the respect in the world for everyone who works because we need people to do everything. I enjoy my job, Hell I fucking love my job. If I didn't I would do something else. I'd get a job with better pay. I have a degree, I know I could make more then I do. But I find immense satisfaction in what I do and, at least to me, that's more important. So yes, you're right I am very lucky to have this job, but it is because I love it and am good at it. Please think about how you phrase things, whether you mean to or not you can really belittle what someone does.
Once again, I would like to point out this is aimed at no one hear. Everyone here who has talked to me about my job has been great and understanding. It's just something I need to get off my chest. Perhaps something I needed to think through myself. Let me end by restating the fact that I love my job and do no think it's a hard one at all, I just hate when someone suggest I barely work because of my schedule or have it easy because sometimes I really do get to play video games. Yes, it's nice... but it also comes at a price.
So after telling people about my job, what I do at it, and my schedule they often say "Wow, you're lucky" too which I reply "Yes, I know I'm lucky to have a job and I'm extremely lucky that I enjoy it" to which they usually add "and you have so much free time, it must be nice". Ugh, that pisses me off. Fuck them. I work 40 hrs, just like most everyone else with a full time job. First of all, here is my schedule: I have a meeting I go to on Wednesday which is from 11-1, I go in Thursday from 6AM-10PM, I work Friday from 2PM-10PM, and I work Saturday from 8AM-10PM. So yes I have Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and most of Wednesday off. Yes, that's good and it is indeed great for potential mini vacations. But no, it's not any better or easier then any other schedule. First of all lets review who I work with. I work with societies throw-aways. I work with the kids who were beaten, raped, and psychological demeaned in ways most people could never comprehend. I work with kids who were raped by their grandfather, beat by their mom, forced as toddlers to watch their dad rape prostitutes or kill someone. I work with kids who find extreme ways to get the attention and subsequently the help they need. I work with kids who know pain and suffering to be a normal part of life. I love these kids. I would do anything to help them. I work with the kids most people wish would just go away so they don't have to hear their stories. I listen to those stories every day I go in to work. I go in Thursday morning at 6 AM until 10 PM. By then I'm so physically and especially emotionally drained I fall asleep within and hour and wake up around 10AM. I eat and shower, I help my grandfather around the house, and maybe get to the gym, and then have to head to work. I go in and lead shift (extra responsibilities). Fridays, suck. KIds are pissed because their piece-of-shit dad decided not to take them out for pass after they waited all week or because they can't because can't see their mom who is dying in the hospital because no one cares enough to give him a ride their. Usually somebody punches a hole in the wall, hurts themselves, or assaults someone. Then I go home and once again pass out in an hour. Saturday I do the same stuff for 14 hours, also I do grocery shopping for the program, and give rides to visit parents who don't have cars or whatever. I then go home and pass out. I have to be trained to restrain kids when they attack me or other staff, and yes this happens often. I have to know how to react to all the various methods of suicide or self harm someone may try. I cook, clean up, listen, advise, entertain, transport, tutor. I regularly clean up blood, tears, sweat, cum, and shit. Everyday I go in to work I know I could end up sitting in a hospital with a kid waiting for them to be admitted for long past my scheduled shift, sometimes a 8hr shift turns into a 16 hr shift and I have no option to say no, I can't tonight I have plans. I go in knowing I could be hurt. I've been kicked and punched I saw a co-worker hit with a chair. Yes, when you ask me about my job I don't tell you all the little details. Why would I want to talk about all this? Why would I want to think about it? I tell you I play video games and hang out with the kids. It's true I do, but that's a small part. But that's the part I want to think about when I'm not at work. Do you really want to hear about how I was attacked by a 13 year old girl who I found smashing her head into the wall and how it took three of us to restrain hair and she peed on me? Maybe you're a sick fuck and want to hear about how she does this because she was constantly raped by her grandfather, pimped out by her mom, and is forced by court order to take enough drugs to put most people into a coma. But do you really think that after dealing with that I want to talk about it with you? Maybe you understand what it's like, but most people don't. When I want to talk about it I talk with my boss or a co-worker of my friend who does the same thing. They understand, they know when it's OK to laugh, they understand sometimes to just shut up when you tear up and give you a hug. Back to the point though, yes I have three days off. But no I don't have anymore free time then you. I go to work and have next to no time to de-stress before the next day. You might work 5 days a week, but remember you go in at 9 and get out at 5 or whatever and have time every night to de-stress. So I have three days straight to de-stress, but just think maybe that's necessary after not being able to between shifts. Maybe just like you sometimes wish you had three days off I sometimes wish I could come home and relax for a whole night in-between days of work. Don't get me wrong. I am by no means trying to argue the opposite, I don't think your schedule is any better or worse then mine. They both have their pros and cons. I suppose like they say, the grass is always greener on the other side.
I am not looking for sympathy or praise for what I do. I am not suggesting my job is any tougher then yours. I could likely never do your job. It would be torturous to work in an office. I couldn't run into a fire and save anyone. I would go insane being someone's bitch in retail. I have all the respect in the world for everyone who works because we need people to do everything. I enjoy my job, Hell I fucking love my job. If I didn't I would do something else. I'd get a job with better pay. I have a degree, I know I could make more then I do. But I find immense satisfaction in what I do and, at least to me, that's more important. So yes, you're right I am very lucky to have this job, but it is because I love it and am good at it. Please think about how you phrase things, whether you mean to or not you can really belittle what someone does.
Once again, I would like to point out this is aimed at no one hear. Everyone here who has talked to me about my job has been great and understanding. It's just something I need to get off my chest. Perhaps something I needed to think through myself. Let me end by restating the fact that I love my job and do no think it's a hard one at all, I just hate when someone suggest I barely work because of my schedule or have it easy because sometimes I really do get to play video games. Yes, it's nice... but it also comes at a price.
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p.s. !!!!, you know.
you don't need to explain yourself to anyone, because people shouldn't be making uninformed remarks. they should take the time to ask.
i can't wait to speak with you today. i've just come to a really great part in my book. it's probably a very unimportant part, but i loved it and how it made me think.
also, i feel a ton more awake.