First, the scientific part of it:
Travis (my bro) has a high probability of having his kidneys collapse on him. He's started smoking, which for a diabetic increases health risks by almost ten-fold, and he's also started smoking pot, which makes the whole situation worse. And now that he's 21, he's also been drinking beer ALL THE TIME. This all adds up to his kidneys showing the early signs of kidney failure. Yes, I know what you're thinking, smoking = bad lungs, drinking = bad liver, but for some reason in diabetics, the kidneys get affected by all this the most, and this hurts the circulation to the extremities of the body, causing parts of the body to die off, like having legs amputated or losing fingers or toes. Diabetics immune systems are extremely potent and get to the point where they start attacking organs that the body needs to survive or be healthy just because they start having problems, like lungs, liver, or kidney for example. In essence, this means that he will EVENTUALLY have kidney failure, but if takes care of himself, he can prolong his life and postpone the illness for a time.
(Sorry for this rather jumbled explanation of diabetes, I have to do some more research into this to explain it better, and right now, I don't have the time).
This is the emotional angle of it:
Doctor, speaking to my brother: "Travis, you knew that all these habits that you've started forming are bad for especially you and your diabetes. Why did you start them even though you had all this knowledge?"
Travis: "Because I don't care anymore."
(This is all information that my mom and dad relayed to me, I wasn't there).
So, I talked to my brother, and needless to say, I was very emotional.
Me: "Travis..."
Trav: "I don't want to hear it."
Me: "Hear what? I'm not going to give you a speech, I just want to talk to you."
Trav: "About what?"
Me: "Do you remember when we were little, and we used to play "Swords" together all the time and have fake sword fights with glorified sticks?"
Trav: "Yeah."
Me: "Those were good times, weren't they?"
Trav: "Yeah."
Me: "Good times...worth living for?"
Trav: "..."
Me: "If I lose you...If you...Who will I share those memories with? Please...I want you to be there when I graduate from college...I want you to be my kids' cool uncle, I want to be your kids' cool aunt, I want to be able to give you a hard time for a long time...I want you to stick around Travis...If you don't...I will be lost. You're the person who knows me the best, and will have known me the longest when we die at an old age. Please, don't give up...I need you...I mean, who will I make fun of? Promise me...That you won't give up...I know it's hard, I've seen you struggle almost your whole life...But you're fighting the good fight, and you're not alone. Promise me, please..."
Travis: "........*sigh*.....Tara....Yeah, I promise."
Me: "Hey Trav?"
Trav: "What?"
Me: "Sorry I lied about not giving you a speech...I got carried away."
Trav: *laughing a little* "Meh, that's ok, you give better speeches than the doctor or mom anyway."
We talked about some other stuff, I'll not bug you guys with the small details.
I also got some sleep last night.
~T.C.
Travis (my bro) has a high probability of having his kidneys collapse on him. He's started smoking, which for a diabetic increases health risks by almost ten-fold, and he's also started smoking pot, which makes the whole situation worse. And now that he's 21, he's also been drinking beer ALL THE TIME. This all adds up to his kidneys showing the early signs of kidney failure. Yes, I know what you're thinking, smoking = bad lungs, drinking = bad liver, but for some reason in diabetics, the kidneys get affected by all this the most, and this hurts the circulation to the extremities of the body, causing parts of the body to die off, like having legs amputated or losing fingers or toes. Diabetics immune systems are extremely potent and get to the point where they start attacking organs that the body needs to survive or be healthy just because they start having problems, like lungs, liver, or kidney for example. In essence, this means that he will EVENTUALLY have kidney failure, but if takes care of himself, he can prolong his life and postpone the illness for a time.
(Sorry for this rather jumbled explanation of diabetes, I have to do some more research into this to explain it better, and right now, I don't have the time).
This is the emotional angle of it:
Doctor, speaking to my brother: "Travis, you knew that all these habits that you've started forming are bad for especially you and your diabetes. Why did you start them even though you had all this knowledge?"
Travis: "Because I don't care anymore."
(This is all information that my mom and dad relayed to me, I wasn't there).
So, I talked to my brother, and needless to say, I was very emotional.
Me: "Travis..."
Trav: "I don't want to hear it."
Me: "Hear what? I'm not going to give you a speech, I just want to talk to you."
Trav: "About what?"
Me: "Do you remember when we were little, and we used to play "Swords" together all the time and have fake sword fights with glorified sticks?"
Trav: "Yeah."
Me: "Those were good times, weren't they?"
Trav: "Yeah."
Me: "Good times...worth living for?"
Trav: "..."
Me: "If I lose you...If you...Who will I share those memories with? Please...I want you to be there when I graduate from college...I want you to be my kids' cool uncle, I want to be your kids' cool aunt, I want to be able to give you a hard time for a long time...I want you to stick around Travis...If you don't...I will be lost. You're the person who knows me the best, and will have known me the longest when we die at an old age. Please, don't give up...I need you...I mean, who will I make fun of? Promise me...That you won't give up...I know it's hard, I've seen you struggle almost your whole life...But you're fighting the good fight, and you're not alone. Promise me, please..."
Travis: "........*sigh*.....Tara....Yeah, I promise."
Me: "Hey Trav?"
Trav: "What?"
Me: "Sorry I lied about not giving you a speech...I got carried away."
Trav: *laughing a little* "Meh, that's ok, you give better speeches than the doctor or mom anyway."
We talked about some other stuff, I'll not bug you guys with the small details.
I also got some sleep last night.
~T.C.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
He should be glad to have a sister like you.....
i'm glad you slept. Relationships like that between siblings is rare in this day and age. The reason your speech didn't hurt him is because you made it a positive one not negative. (dont you want this, wouldn't this be good? wasn't that fun? as opposed to Stop this, don't do that, this is bad for you)
Also, kids stick together to survive their parents. No matter what happens in a bro/sis relationship like that you will always be close b/c you went throught the same shit at the same time, not like parents who went throught it and then tried to help you. It's more effective b/c it from his point of view. You done good sweetie, don't ever lose that connection with him.