My dear sweet grandma had some things that she would repeat for the benefit of others. One of those things was: Never tell anybody your problems. Half dont care and the other half are glad. No, havent heard that one? How about this? Misery loves company. These are, more often than not, a true statement in both cases. When you find yourself in a relationship the easiest and quicker of ways to find yourself out of said relationship is to let someone else into the relationship. The person you confide in outside of the relationship can go from your rock to your poison without either of you even knowing that anything flipped. It starts out as bragging. Yeah, I said it. The other night they did the best thing with their _____. After a bit of confiding the good you dont think anything of sharing the not so good. I hate the way they are just cowed by their parents. At first most will nod and smile but you can only nod and smile so long before more is given. You know I dont know why they treat you like that. The people you lean on will in time push back. They may not even know they are doing it. I dont let anybody I am with do ____. The next thought in your head is probably: If they dont take it then why am I? I may not be better than they are, but Ill be damned if Im not just as good. Some may not even be good hearted about it. They could be deliberately undermining the relationship for whatever screwed up reasons. On the surface they are saying I really hate that you are having a rough go right now. While the internal is Go ahead and dump them already. I need you back in the role of single person I have you put in. People are all about naming and labeling other people in their lives. If you dare to step out of the role they have you assigned to then there is hell to pay. I have seen friendships that seemed solid crumble and dissolve over much less. I dont know anybody that understands my marriage. Good. I take that as proof that we are doing it right. Dont let anyone get in between you and your partner. This goes double for family.
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