terrakotta

Okay. Im feeling a little confused about my feelings right now and I just need a place to vent.

As I mentioned in my last journal entry, my friendship with Jen has been on the rocks for a few weeks, thanks to her girlfriend, who I will call the puppet master-slash-body-snatcher, since she has turned Jen into a pod person with no brain nor life of her own. Jen is on Social Security due to a mental illness, and she receives $550 a month to pay her rent and expenses. Well, last week Jen called to tell me that she bought Puppet Master a diamond and amethyst ring. I can only assume that she spent a good of her monthly check to pay for this ring. PuppetMaster, on the other hand, works full time and still lives with her parents because she doesnt want to pay rent. In the past, by the way, PM has told people on numerous occasions that she needs to marry a man (yes MAN) who will pay for everything so she doesnt have to work. No, not so she can raise a family: so she can do NOTHING and become the epitome of the self-absorbed bitch that she is.

Anyway, this afternoon, I spoke with Jen. I was allowed to speak with her briefly because PM was busy plucking her facial hair (you dont want to know) in Jens bathroom. Here is the gist of the conversation:

ME: So, did you give her the ring?
JEN: Uh, yes.
ME: What was it, an early Valentines Day present?
JEN: No, its an engagement ring.
ME: Oh? Youre getting married?
JEN: Yes.
ME: Hmmm. So whens the date?
JEN: I dont know. A few years.
ME: A few years? Why not sooner?

Let me interrupt here. I know damn well that PuppetMaster has no intention of marrying Jen. First of all, shes not even a real lesbian. She wont acknowledge their relationship in public, nor will she go down on Jen because she claims Jens smell is yucky. Also, she told Jen not to tell her parents they were even dating. Of course, since Jen is willing to buy PM anything she wishes, buy PM dinner on a regular basis even though she cant afford to feed herself, and since PM can smoke pot at Jens apartment (since PM still lives with her parents at the age of 33, in the same twin bed and bedroom she had as a teenage, I might add), Jen is a damn good catch. PM doesnt have to put out, pay for anything, or even allow Jen to have any social life outside of her, and being the controlling (sorry for this folks): CUNT she is, this is the ideal situation for her. She can do what she wants, when she wants, and get everything she wants, without giving anything but some platonic attention to Jen. But I kept my mouth shut and tried, in a roundabout way, to just get Jen thinking a little realistically. Conversation resumed:

JEN: We dont have the money right now.
ME: What do you need money for?
JEN: Well, for a house.
ME: Why doesnt {{PuppetMaster}} just move in with you?
JEN: Well you need other things to be married too.
ME: Did she buy you an engagement ring too?
JEN: No.
ME: Is she going to?
JEN: I dont think so.

Sidenote again: PuppetMaster/Bitch/Cuntwad thinks Jen is a disgusting slob, and even made a checklist of cleaning activities Jen must perform on her apartment before PM comes over. Also, she will only lay down on a special sheet that Jens dogs arent allowed to touch. According to PM, she wont sleep over Jens house because she is so allergic to Jens dogs and the mildew in Jens apartment. Funny, thats not a problem at all when she spends 7 or 8 hours there on a Saturday, downing Percoset and smoking pot and cigarettes the whole time.

ME: So, when you get a place together, what will you do with the dogs?
JEN: I havent thought about that.
ME: Well, you can go on her health insurance.
JEN: No, my Medicaid is pretty good.
ME: Im sure you dont need any more money than what you two make now. I mean, what other expenses would you have? Is {{EVIL LUCIFER BITCH}} planning on getting artificially inseminated?
JEN: We havent talked about that.
ME: Are you going to have kids?
JEN: We havent talked about it.
ME: Well, once you are married, youll have shared assets, so it wont matter who makes the money. What she makes will be the both of yours. Im sure if you look at it that way, you can make the bills. She works. I bet she could qualify for a mortgage on a condo or something.
JEN: I dont think a condo would take the dogs.
ME: Oh. Well, did you call you parents and tell them?
JEN: Tell them what?
ME: That youre getting married! Are they excited?
JEN: I havent told them.
ME: Well are you going to tell them at dinner?
JEN: I dont know. No.
ME: Well, did {{BODY SNATCHER}} call her parents and tell them?? Shes engaged!
JEN: No.
ME: Is she going to?
JEN: I dont know.

{uncomfortable silence}

ME: Well, congratulations!
JEN: Thanks.
ME: Are you going to invite me to the wedding?
JEN: Yeah.

Now let me tell you why I am feeling confused. I am confused about whether or not I even want to maintain this friendship with Jen anymore. I love her dearly, and she and I have been close friends for a long time, but lately it feels like I am talking to a sock puppet and her girlfriends fist is the one shoved up her ass. Also, while I am quite far from being a conservative Family Values prophet, I am annoyed that Jen and PuppetMaster are treating marriage like its some sort of prom date. I feel like I have been transplanted into the middle of a scene from 28 Days Later, and Jen is one of the zombies. A part of me feels as though her malignant delusion is sucking me dry. Every time I get off of the phone with her, I feel empty. Am I a bitch if I let our relationship disintegrate? Id like to say we could maintain our friendship by just hanging out when she is not with PuppetCunt, but she is NEVER without her. Im not sure what to do.

Thanks for reading, even if you faked it and just skimmed. I feel somewhat better letting it out. Kind of like when you throw up: you feel a little better, but you still stink like vomit.