I just applied to Indiana University in hopes of getting in as a late admission. Please pray that it goes well because I really like the school. The good news is I was accepted into Drexel for the January semester. I will be apply to Temple as well. I really want to get out of here. It pisses me off to be in Orland Park again. I cannot really stand the friends I have here because they are just fucking stupid. No ambition or desire to go anywhere with their lives. Its so sad.
I have become so lazy. I moved my shit back from C-dale and it sucked ass. Now I hope to get a job if I do not get into Indiana U. I applied for my financial aid. I kind of just blew through it and want to get it done. I just want to get the fuck out of here. I will have my dad take my shit to the accountant so that I can get all my back taxes filed.
I really want to get into Indiana University as it will give me the college experience at a better college. I just really have to decide on which colleges to attend. I was accpted at Drexel so thats good. I also will probably be accepted at UNLV, and I can still head back to SIU (though I really consider this a last resort). I will probably apply to Temple, Villa Nova, and Penn State. I...
I really miss Jennifer. It is tearing me up inside lately. I am so lonely and I want her to come with me. Wherever is ok. I just want her to be with me as I have not really been happy since the last time I saw her in Arizona. Just laying next to her is what I really miss.
I look at my life right now and I see it is in shambles. I really am depressed. I cant think straight or focus like I could back in high school. I eat more, I suffer from insomnia, and I sleep all day. I have no motivation or will power anymore. I just want to get out of here!
Wherever you are Jenn, know that I miss you and I hope life is going well. I suspect that you will be breaking up with Jeff once it gets serious. I also suspect that your new found faith is just your way of dealing with your problems. I think that it will all come crashing down as it usually does for you. And in a way I hope it does so I have a reason to be in your life again. I am always there for you and yet your never really there for me anymore. You wont listen to reason when I talk to you. I acted a like a complete asshole but I figure after being close friends for so long that you would at least break my heart in person or over the phone since we could not get together. Not a two sentence email.
You may not think it hurt me so much but it destroyed me. I was devastated for a few months. I was depressed and just lonely. Luckily I had made one good friend in college that I could talk to. The rest of them were assholes and twofaced liars. My grades dropped drastically and my life just took a drastic turn for the worse. I still feel these pangs of emptiness and loneliness every day. I really hate the way my life has been going and I feel that it would be alright if you were by myside.
I really want to be a police officer. I really need to get into shape and quit fucking around. I should get on a diet and start exercising like I keep saying I am going to. I am watching some show about a cop in Miami who worked as a homicide detective and is now a LT. on a vice team. He seems like the man I want to be. I really want to do something cool, exciting, and good for people. I have to start really working towards this goal. I really do not have any other goals for myself.
Anyways I will post more once I find out about schools. In the meantime I will continue posting about my shitty life.
I have become so lazy. I moved my shit back from C-dale and it sucked ass. Now I hope to get a job if I do not get into Indiana U. I applied for my financial aid. I kind of just blew through it and want to get it done. I just want to get the fuck out of here. I will have my dad take my shit to the accountant so that I can get all my back taxes filed.
I really want to get into Indiana University as it will give me the college experience at a better college. I just really have to decide on which colleges to attend. I was accpted at Drexel so thats good. I also will probably be accepted at UNLV, and I can still head back to SIU (though I really consider this a last resort). I will probably apply to Temple, Villa Nova, and Penn State. I...
I really miss Jennifer. It is tearing me up inside lately. I am so lonely and I want her to come with me. Wherever is ok. I just want her to be with me as I have not really been happy since the last time I saw her in Arizona. Just laying next to her is what I really miss.
I look at my life right now and I see it is in shambles. I really am depressed. I cant think straight or focus like I could back in high school. I eat more, I suffer from insomnia, and I sleep all day. I have no motivation or will power anymore. I just want to get out of here!
Wherever you are Jenn, know that I miss you and I hope life is going well. I suspect that you will be breaking up with Jeff once it gets serious. I also suspect that your new found faith is just your way of dealing with your problems. I think that it will all come crashing down as it usually does for you. And in a way I hope it does so I have a reason to be in your life again. I am always there for you and yet your never really there for me anymore. You wont listen to reason when I talk to you. I acted a like a complete asshole but I figure after being close friends for so long that you would at least break my heart in person or over the phone since we could not get together. Not a two sentence email.
You may not think it hurt me so much but it destroyed me. I was devastated for a few months. I was depressed and just lonely. Luckily I had made one good friend in college that I could talk to. The rest of them were assholes and twofaced liars. My grades dropped drastically and my life just took a drastic turn for the worse. I still feel these pangs of emptiness and loneliness every day. I really hate the way my life has been going and I feel that it would be alright if you were by myside.
I really want to be a police officer. I really need to get into shape and quit fucking around. I should get on a diet and start exercising like I keep saying I am going to. I am watching some show about a cop in Miami who worked as a homicide detective and is now a LT. on a vice team. He seems like the man I want to be. I really want to do something cool, exciting, and good for people. I have to start really working towards this goal. I really do not have any other goals for myself.
Anyways I will post more once I find out about schools. In the meantime I will continue posting about my shitty life.