techno_ballerina

The morning was spent in IHop, studying with my apple pancakes and overly sugared coffee. I had today totally off; no work, no classes. Did some shopping today, bought some panties and a thing to hook my ipod up to my car (which will come in handy...it's an hour drive every other day to the college). I'm shopping for The Boy too but geez...men are so fucking hard to shop for. And everything I want to buy him is either too lame or too expensive. It's so hard being broke. I hate borrowing money from my parents; my job pays hardly anything, and I work my ass off, I'm so tired of it. I've totally made up my mind I'm out of here once I've my LPN. I can't be here anymore, I can't stand my parents or this house or this city anymore. Eighteen years in this city and...yeah. I need out. Now.

I woke up this morning and realised I hadn't cut in six months as of today. Not my record, which is nine months, but I'm working towards that.

I can't stand my parents anymore. I <i>need</i> someone who has faith in me. I get sick of them saying "Even if you don't get a Ph.D. in psychotherapy, you'll always be a great floor nurse and your husband can always take care of you!" Pfftt. What nerve they have. It'd be great if someone could say "I know you can do it, I have faith in you," & so forth.

I need out. I need out. It's going to be a hellish night, my dad just finished his third can and he's been home for an hour and a half.

I wish I had a friend's house to go to.