tawnya

Tomorrow marks only seven days until I leave Seattle. Yesterday was my last day on shift at the boxcar. I have a date with Chip and Easton to fuck up some trivia via team Boxcar tomorrow night. Wednesday night is a date with my ever-lovin' Hippi (it's his last name, I still hate fuckin hippies) to go to his bar and let him get me all shitty drunk. Thursday I go visit one of my favorite regulars in a very unfortunate place. Friday is the karaoke monster jam. Possibly a yard sale on Saturday and Sunday and loading everything into the truck Monday. Busy, indeed. There's packing and sorting through all my earthly possessions in there, too.

I can't even express how much I'm going to miss this place, my life and all the people in it. I just have to go and search for a few things I seem to have lost along the way. None of you know me, you think you do, but I've kept you all at arms length, and for that I am so very sorry. I need to learn how to be open. I need to learn how to let others listen to me as I am willing to do for them. I need to learn what it's like to let others know who I really am. There's still me here, I'll always be loud and crass, but I need to let others see the rest of me sometimes. I'm not all magenta and rockin' out. Sometimes I'm a crossword puzzle and mint tea.

So please come see me on Friday night. Seeing all of you means so much to me. Now, more than ever.