I look before my world today and ask...why is everyone dying? Farrah, Michael, Ed, Billy...all so special in different ways. What the fuck? Do you all realize what this means?! People like Zac Efron will be completely taking over the entertainment world! People will flock to $700 seats all to view 2 minutes of Zac brushing his wig and powdering his foundation. Mothers will begin taking money out of their childrens' college savings all to stay on top of the "cool mothers" list and rush their daughters (in a limosuine) to Miley Cyrus concerts. Lindsay Lohan is already under serious belief that her life is closely related to Marilyn Monroe's!
Megan Fox (although very hot) believes she is an ACTRESS. *coughs up blood* And OH MYYY DEAR SWEET AND MERCIFUL JESUS; SARAH PALIN, queen of Alaskan snow continues to fight for presidency! *slams own head with frying pan* We must form a resistance... 
Join me. All you have to do is make sure that the LEGENDS remain alive. If you see a legend (ex. tina turner), help them across the street, carry grocceries, call them every now and then to ensure they are ok. STOP THIS MADNESS!
Tawainai extends her greatest and deepest and sexiest apologies out to you all for ceasing her storytelling temporarily.
My laptop has unexpectedly crashed on me and now i must sit upright and type like NORMAL person..ewwwww 
Systems should be running smoothly again by err....umm...next semester? I'll be receiving more grants for school then lol. 
I have comprised a list of possible assassins....
Last weekend Tim and i attended a free concert for cancer downtown underneath the glorious Arch. The legends Sheryl Crow and Elvis Costello gave an excellent performance. The sun was setting and the hot sticky air was driving everyone crazy. Tim was buzzing while i was pretty damned drunk. I should not have listened when he told me to "drink up" before we got there and handed me a drink. It was a Captain Morgan with a SPLASH of Coke. 
(I promise to post pics of my drunk ass as soon as i can get Tim to shend me shum. ) We danced and sang and spooned in the love tent with a bunch of hippies .(Hippie part not true.... But the spooning? Yes...
) Sheryl performed 3 encores and rocked the stank out of us. The concert wasn't even the best part. The true most glorious part of the evening was when Tim scored a bunch of photos of Sheryl and Elvis as well an autograph on his arm. We waited out back for over an hour letting the guards beat our asses half to death all for the love of music. We literally didnt get BEAT but we were herded all over. Right when S and E were about to head out, the guards magically disappeared. WTF. As Sheryl glided down the steps, Tim and I were both in awe at how tiny she was! She carried with her a plastic container of some sort of dried fruit and a rolled up bag of Fritos. Elvis came out looking cool as hell. He didn't even seem to notice us, he was so cool. He sported a beautiful pin-striped suit with this deep purple velvet fedora. I stood there and cried while Tim had a quick chat with the man. Tim asked "Can ya sign my arm?" and Elvis replies, "....could be toxic!" LMAO!!! I do have photos to prove all that I am claiming tonight. Just be pay-shunt.
From now on I will be reviewing various and random items i think you all should partake in.
The two items for THIS week are:
Fage Total Yogurt and Good Sex
We took a stroll through the St. Louis sculpture park and took in some great art. We were not pleased with the security standards at all. I would like to know who the hell the coordinator of that place is. Spread throughout the park are BEAUTIFUL sculptures, no doubt but there were also these ugly cheap assed inflatable flamingoes spread all over the park. They looked SO cheap in fact that Tim and I assumed they were left there as a JOKE. We do things like that all the time! In Springfield, we planted two bikes downtown. One was placed in the doorway of the Republican office. The other was placed on one of the pathways at the capital building. Anyways we thought the flamingo was a joke not knowing at the time that there were more all over. So Tim picks it up and we are merrily skipping about until this guard starts chasing us down for it. He explained that the pink birds were a part of the park. Tim humbly handed it over, apologized, and patted the guard on the back. So stupid.... 
With Love of None Other,
T
P.S. WOW...
