67 days of clean time. LIfe is hard right now. I got served my divorce papers, a relationship I thought was gonna work didn't, I've barely had any contact with my my kids, etc.
Everyday seems to be the same as the one before, I'm up at 630am, I shower, take my meds, go to a meeting of NA. My whole day is just meetings and playing guitar witht the occasional Seth Macfarlane cartoon break. I've got everything but the S3-5 of American Dad, I have everything else. I watch them daily for a pick me up.
Saw the movie THE TOWN with Ben Affleck. Cool flick.
To YOU cuz I know U read this. I wish U no ill will. U asked me NOT to write about U online which is EXACTLY what U did. So why shouldn't I, honestly? U broke my heart with your constant critiques of me, my ex wife, my roommate. U say u LOVE me, but all u ever did was put me down in one form or another. The last phone conversation we had I told u I was sick and had a hard time talking, so U never let me get a word in edgewise. U basically cut me off anytime I tried to talk to you and tell U how I felt. This is part of the reason I want no further contact with U. U are selfish and self centered, it's all about U and frankly I deserve better than that. I need someone who accepts my flaws and character defects and doesnt point them out at any given opportunity. U accuse me of dredging up the past but U do it ALL THE TIME. I don't want to hear from U. Not an email, not a text, not a teary fucking voice mail. LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE. U AND I ARE DONE, PERMANENTLY. Quit your fucking pity party to people (mutual friends) "Oh, he broke my heart...." etc. I will accept blame for my actions, but honest to god, ur to blame here. U fucked me over, not the other way around. Have a nice life, just leave me be. I've moved on, I'm already dating someone else who DOES accept me warts and all. She supports me doesnt tear me down like U did. I'm not made to fell less than with her. I hope U find someone that makes U happy, cuz IT sure as fuck won't be me.....
Sorry for the rant guys but it had to be said. I loathe drama and fucking bullshit. Especially when I'm the ONE it's about.
Everyday seems to be the same as the one before, I'm up at 630am, I shower, take my meds, go to a meeting of NA. My whole day is just meetings and playing guitar witht the occasional Seth Macfarlane cartoon break. I've got everything but the S3-5 of American Dad, I have everything else. I watch them daily for a pick me up.
Saw the movie THE TOWN with Ben Affleck. Cool flick.
To YOU cuz I know U read this. I wish U no ill will. U asked me NOT to write about U online which is EXACTLY what U did. So why shouldn't I, honestly? U broke my heart with your constant critiques of me, my ex wife, my roommate. U say u LOVE me, but all u ever did was put me down in one form or another. The last phone conversation we had I told u I was sick and had a hard time talking, so U never let me get a word in edgewise. U basically cut me off anytime I tried to talk to you and tell U how I felt. This is part of the reason I want no further contact with U. U are selfish and self centered, it's all about U and frankly I deserve better than that. I need someone who accepts my flaws and character defects and doesnt point them out at any given opportunity. U accuse me of dredging up the past but U do it ALL THE TIME. I don't want to hear from U. Not an email, not a text, not a teary fucking voice mail. LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE. U AND I ARE DONE, PERMANENTLY. Quit your fucking pity party to people (mutual friends) "Oh, he broke my heart...." etc. I will accept blame for my actions, but honest to god, ur to blame here. U fucked me over, not the other way around. Have a nice life, just leave me be. I've moved on, I'm already dating someone else who DOES accept me warts and all. She supports me doesnt tear me down like U did. I'm not made to fell less than with her. I hope U find someone that makes U happy, cuz IT sure as fuck won't be me.....
Sorry for the rant guys but it had to be said. I loathe drama and fucking bullshit. Especially when I'm the ONE it's about.
kas:
be strong love!!!! thinking about you and your recovery 
super proud!!! I know its hard 
it works if you work is so work it cause you're worth it!
super proud!!! I know its hard it works if you work is so work it cause you're worth it!
estrada:
Keep taking those steps and stay the course.