i cant seem to say a word without the context being turned upside down...
arg. i dunno why i bother with anything anymore. I shouldn't open my mouth... I should toss the cell phone in the pool, cut off the LAN and internet, tell my down stairs neighbors to FUCK OFF (littering, dirty mother fuckers) and board myself up in my apt.
i just want to be alone... all the time, alone. it is so much easier...
this world just eats you up only to spit you up and do it all over again 24 hours later.
if i could, i would stay in bed all damn day. a bed buddy would be nice, but no one that pushes me off the bed or bitches about my sleeping the wrong way.
i'm sorry. i am not comfortable sleeping with my head at the headboard. i'll just continue to sleep on the futon. with my head pointed south. what does that translate too in regards to feng shi? - does it mean i have a bright future, cause that is what I am sleeping for....
a bright future. HA.
i have to stop pretending that everything is perfect... and that everything will just "work out"
i am not happy...
why am i not happy.
i hate this feeling i have and my body, it hurts so fucking bad. something is terribly wrong with me.
...and i ramble... but i'm not gonna appologize for it this time.
you dont like it, tough shit.
***
my little sister's birthday is coming up really soon... she's growing up so fast i worry about her. she is so smart, soon enough she will realize how sucky this place really is.
did i mention that one of my best friend's mom has cancer?
::sigh:: pray for her and all of us, while you're at it.
if we're not dying from disease we are dying from distress...
but alas this world manages to go round? - WTF?
arg. i dunno why i bother with anything anymore. I shouldn't open my mouth... I should toss the cell phone in the pool, cut off the LAN and internet, tell my down stairs neighbors to FUCK OFF (littering, dirty mother fuckers) and board myself up in my apt.
i just want to be alone... all the time, alone. it is so much easier...
this world just eats you up only to spit you up and do it all over again 24 hours later.
if i could, i would stay in bed all damn day. a bed buddy would be nice, but no one that pushes me off the bed or bitches about my sleeping the wrong way.
i'm sorry. i am not comfortable sleeping with my head at the headboard. i'll just continue to sleep on the futon. with my head pointed south. what does that translate too in regards to feng shi? - does it mean i have a bright future, cause that is what I am sleeping for....
a bright future. HA.
i have to stop pretending that everything is perfect... and that everything will just "work out"
i am not happy...
why am i not happy.
i hate this feeling i have and my body, it hurts so fucking bad. something is terribly wrong with me.
...and i ramble... but i'm not gonna appologize for it this time.
you dont like it, tough shit.
***
my little sister's birthday is coming up really soon... she's growing up so fast i worry about her. she is so smart, soon enough she will realize how sucky this place really is.
did i mention that one of my best friend's mom has cancer?
::sigh:: pray for her and all of us, while you're at it.if we're not dying from disease we are dying from distress...
but alas this world manages to go round? - WTF?
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Im here to talk if you need anything!