taters

so after like 3 years of scoping out this site.. I decide to join out of boredom.. of the like 700 suicide girls, I stumble across "presley".. and for some random reason decide to read her blogs.. annd then within her personal photos there's a familiar face........... lindsey. tapesidea. from lipstick party. that gorgeous, unmistakable face. initally my heart jumped because I thought it was my chance to get in touch with her again as ericha and I hadn't talked to her in ages. and then I catch the "in loving memory" my world stopped. I started panicking. and then clicked the link that turned out to be her livejournal. and proceeded to read the obituary left by her family... the room started spinning and I became lightheaded. I think I stopped breathing. and my heart stopped beating..all I saw was june 22.. june 22.. I was freaking out so bad and in such denial I didn't even notice that it was a year ago, this june 22. what horrible friends we are.. we havent talked to miss lindsey in over a year, obviously. poor "presley" I probably sent her like 6 hysterical messages pleading for more information. I feel so selfish. she's probably so damaged from it, and Im drilling her..but I dont know anyone else who knew her. i tried to eat. I felt like I was going to vomit. I left. and rode my bike like 7 miles to clear my head... its still cloudy.. until I find out what happened. or talk it over with someone who knew her.... life is too short. why do the good dye young. why her.. she was so talented, ambitious, beautiful, funny, witty, brilliant....things do not happen for a reason. there is no reason she needed to be taken.. that her family and friend's hearts had to be broken. that her incredible future had to be stripped from her.. and people wonder why I don't have "faith" in god.


you had impacted our lives so intensely, lindsey.. you're forever in our thoughts and hearts, girl..

rest peacefully angel... =*0(