tantrum_child

my friend
today i learned
of your intention
to undo all
of your resolve
today i learned
of your rebellion
against all things
you've worked
to be

that knowing determination
an insiders view
the steadfast beliefs
where have you gone?
my friend
hypocritical?
maybe
after years of tears
and upset
at those who choose
to tempt fate
to risk sanity
to damage lives and lovers
for the sake of that higher feeling

my friend
you know
where this could go
you've seen it
with your beautiful blue eyes

i understand
of course
and the snapping response
why can't i do what i want to do?
to have some fun
to release some pressure
the relief when you finally
quit fighting
and conform.

and i wouldn't mind
if it were anyone else
but why now?
what for?
where went the girl
with such argument
for the opposition?
how now
do you undo
the hypocrisy of judgement passed
over those of us long living
the underworld?

the pull
join us
join us
i know it
what's the harm?
it's easier than fighting
it's all around you
and perhaps you're tired
of being the one to say no
perhaps you're tired
of not knowing
understandable completely

but i care


and possibly a hint
of jealousy in my heart
that you place the trust
of ur initiation
into the hands
of someone else
when you dared to pass judgement
on those before her?

ultimately
my problem lies
in that it's so unlike you
i have to wonder
what inspires you?
and when did your strength break?

and effectively to
reassure you
it's ok to not
and it's ok to.
but remember
the reason behind
your prolonged resistance
you know the truth
be warned
don't let it get you
for it will present a world
far more glorious than this
a world i wish i'd never entered
for it becomes harder to leave
and a will to remain
in carefree bliss
will be the end of all you've worked for.

i just worry
my friend

i love you

p.s. photos of my peanut coming soon !!
she's going so well!! she loves her mummy so much! she climbs up my legs and back straight up to nuzzle my head, she wants my attention ALL the time, and if i wasn't so needy in return, it might bother me. as it is, im happy this way. we don't need anyone else, my peanut and i