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tank_girl

Denver

Member Since 2005

Followers 65 Following 47

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Monday Oct 19, 2009

Oct 19, 2009
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I got my first job welding and I am moving to a neighborhood I can't stand. My step-kids love the place but I want to scream and run very far away everytime I'm there. I want to feel different, but this palce stands for everything I'm not and I'm moving there. I try to keep a postive attitude, that I have a car and I can still drive to the city anytime the mood strikes, which is about 30 miles aways. Whats the saying, "everytime a door closes god opens a window for you to jump out of"? Have you ever felt the ghost of your past haunting you? Everytime you turn around you can feel their stares and disapointment, it unnerves you at the weirdest moments.
I found out my father has heart disease and no matter where I am I remember all my happy childhood memories running through my head and I'll want to cry. He was my only happy childhood memories and I feel like if something happend to him, they would die with him. My boyfriend will say something to his kids and before I know it I'm ten again and my dad is sending me into a fit of giggles and than I'm back in the present crying. It kills me when someone doesn't realize how much they mean to you, how much they influence all the choises you make in your life.
But I got my first welding job.

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