bleh....my world is so bleak and dreary right now. i hate when my mind drifts into the deep abyss of emptiness and hopelessness. why in the fuck did i join the army??? i wish i could go back about 8 and 1/2 months and no sign my name to the fucking binding contract that i cannot seem to get out of. i can't stand this fucking conservative shit. i've been in training for nearly 8 months and i'm losing my fucking mind!!! i HATE drill sgts!!! death to them all!!! they make my life fucking miserable. hell everyone around here makes me life fucking miserable. and where in the hell are all the lesbians??? my friend is in the army and she said there are so many lesbians...LIAR! there are barely any females at all; my company consist of 350 people and only 16 of them are female, and none of them even remotely resemble hottness or beauty and they are all fucking straight, drrrrr!!! i cannot serve 4 more years, 4 months and 7 days....i WON'T make it. and i figured out how much i make an hour 2.08...can you believe it. i suffer through fucking hell and that's all i make. they try to say well we feed you and cloth you and give your shelter. well i live in a tiny-ass room with 6 other bitches and i sleep on a bunkbed that moves when i move and the top bunk is held on by two batteries, how fucking getto! and the food they serve us is barely ediable and who in the hell wants to wear fucking BDU's all day, and the fucking berete sucks ass. i am in HELL...hell on earth. somebody please rescue me. oh and because i have such a good mos (job) i am surround by fucking nerds....i want death! and to make matters worse i graduate before exodus (xmas) and i was suppose to have orders before 12 jan and it's now been 4 weeks since exodus and i won't have orders to leave tradoc (training) for another two weeks... i wont make it!!! not that i'm excited about permanent party because all that means is iraq, but at least there won't be drill sgts breathing down my neck at all times and i'll only have one roommate, and i will have access to a computer 24/7 (i still can't believe it let me on the site, i try all the time and it says porn is not allowed, blah blah blah). all i know is once i get to permanent party and get my 11,000 bonus i'm going to mental health and i'm going to convince them that i am a fucking nut case and i'm getting the hell out of the shit hole....the military is a fucking joke! i'm never wear camo again and i'm putting all my piercings back in addition to others....oooooh i miss my piercings. well i suppose i've bitched enough for one entry, not that anyone is gonna read this but i feel better now.
bye4now
bye4now