sylvie

i am not a happy pirate! the past 2 weeks have been totally kicking my ass. i've been giving myself heart burn! 21 year olds aren't supposed to have heart burn! i am swearing off things that will distract me from studying. i'm not gogin to cartoons tonight oor last week. i'm trying not to watch TV, or have music on. and no masterbation. untill thursday, i've gone a few days already and i'm ok. i've found that i've just been doing it just b/c i'm bored. it's not good. i'm a lame ass. i am going to be the oldest non religous ofiliated virgin ever. i can deal it's fine. but i found someone that i would liek to have sex with and all that i fell feel i deserve to have sex with someone i like and are comefortable with and cares for me and is my friend... but no, can't have it. damn you life!!! is it b/c i think about it too much? i deserve things and i dont' think i'll ever get them.