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sweetscarling

the bowels of Jersey

Member Since 2005

Followers 22 Following 23

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Sunday May 08, 2005

May 7, 2005
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Repost:
Updates:
Completely nutty over getting my fashion show together...
searching for grants
a great PR person in the industry and NYC area$$$$!!
a NYC gigantic gallery space to hold it in ( the space that I originally had is now 5 million times too small and NJ is too stinky and too far for these media and high society folks to treck to or , HEAVEN FORBID!!, soil their precious PRADA sling backs whilst getting across the river ) $$$$$!!!
Setting a new date
Getting the tons of fabric and supplies I need
Gotta work on the new site, InviTes
Who do I invite?
How do I approach them?
Need a Lawyer, A XANAX, an InVeStor, An AnGeL A MirAcLE, and BrEaK froM my SPINNING BRAIN!!

ADD to this to the Mess above... ThE prOposAL I am putting together for the WhiTney OR PS1 not suRe whiCh.. I am ALICE falling down the rabbit hole.. tHE ElevAtor Shaft, the void that spirals to CentER of the Earth, ALICE under glass, under microscope, under weight, UnderGroUnD...

The ProMiSEs I have Yet to fulfill for the NetWork Of Artists I CaLL, Who TruLy Are, my Friends, The ones with thEiR eYes & HearTs FillEd With YearNing, DemanDinG to Be RecoGniZed, HEarD, Compensated, Satiated, The Ones WaiTing.. waiting on somethinG, ...on SomeoNe to HelP them.. HeAveN oR HeLL, AnGeL or DeViL, GoD, Let it Be me...I WAnt sO BadLy to Be thAt somEonE!! GiVe thEm A LeG UP, An Open WindoW, The Key To GeT IN...A lIGht a WaY..GueSs wHAt it WiLL TakE ????? !! $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Right, well on to the next thing... I need some advice from an outsider, YOU, preferably.

I have this friend will call him RN... hee hee Registered Nurse... ... tangent, sorreee..

RN and I were very,V. Close. Totally PLatonic, RN happens to be same sex oriented, We shared a very close and (what i thought was V meaningful ) friendship.. I shared things with RN, secrets and inner most feelings and thoughts...trusted in RN deeply.. Let myself trust RN was a BIG,HUGE step for me...but RN assured me it would be ok to let him in.
RN professed the same unearthly bond to me on his side... I went so far as creating an entire body of work around him, as an expression and symbol of my joy and happiness that I had finally found such a "pure, meaningful, healthy, even godly" new friendship.

PLEASE NOTE:I Dont Have V.V. ClosE FriEnds..., they do not exsist in my life anymore, save for my husband and my mother.... I Don't TruST people, friends, enough for me to let my guard down and let them in, into where they might do damage, where they might be able to really hurt me, I HAPPENED TO LET THIS PERSON IN, I thought now was the time to start trusting again.
END NOTE:

STORY COMMENCES...

RN lived V. Close to me for a very LonG time.

Recently, Suddenly, without word, or warning RN moved, left, vanished, without a trace... I did my utmost for about 2 months to find RN again and I finally was able to correspond...

RN is now within reach, RN professed his platonic & undying love for me.

RN desires to be visited, called, remain bosom friends with me ...

RN has not revealed where he lives, who he is with, what his new phone number is, BUT IS EXPECTING A VISIT FROM ME the seemingly closest friend in the world ?!!

What The F*** ?! How in the world do I respond to this?

ANY ADVICE IS VERY WELCOME....

Cheers Darlings,
PinkAddiCTiOn
flamesofhades:
Ummmm ask his address???

H
May 8, 2005
devildoll23:
I hope your stress simmers down soon!!! Good luck with your fashion show!! smile
May 8, 2005

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