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sushiasuka

Portsmouth, VA

Member Since 2005

Followers 165 Following 144

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Sunday Sep 27, 2009

Sep 27, 2009
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I really want to get my new tattoo started, but there is no way I can afford it, with all the travel I have to do to get to these weddings. Oh well... I have to wait again....

The real reason for this post is related to thought. I normally do not ramble about my brain and the crazy things it comes up with, but I think this topic is one of misunderstood controversy. Polygamy is the topic in question. I believe that most people go straight to the thought of Mormon Polygamy, which is an extreme of the effect. It involves girls getting married at 12 or16 years of age, and giving a man who already has 6 wifes, and 15 kids, more children. This is not the typical relationship, and I also believe that those who practice polygamy keep it quite because of the "stereotype builders" like the Mormons.

I practice a polygamy-based relationship and it could not be better. I really enjoy having more then one partner. I have what I consider my "primary relationship" which is my boyfriend of 4 years who I love very much and plan to marry one day. And then I have "secondary relationships" which is currently set-up with about 3 girls and 5 guys (most are long distance). There are a set of rules that in place between my primary and myself, that we have both agreed on, which concern things like: who the secondaries are, the form of protections in use, and an 'action based on permission' system.

My primary has meet and talked with all my secondaries, he is only involved in relationships with 4 my secondaries, the other 4 relationships are mine alone. I am sure to be careful with my secondary relationships. It is important to remember that they are poly too, and you do not know everyone that they play with, which why it is important to use condoms, or restrict insertion, etc. It is also important to make sure that all partners involved are clean of STDs, illness, etc. These a rules that need to be put in place when considering such a relationship. Personally as far as rules the permission system works great in my situation. All it requires is for me to say something to the effect of: "Love, I am going to VA and may be seeing (person 1) or (person 2) while there, is it okay with you if I play with them while I am there?" He might yes to both, or only yes to one, or say no to both, or he might put a restriction on it like, "Yes you may play them, but it must be oral sex only, no penetration will be allowed." The power is balanced though, because he must ask me to play with his secondaries as well. As long as all parties involved can agree and follow the rules set by the "primary relationship" then this system works wonderfully.

I think that the ideal Christian monogamous relationship is a load of crap. It leads to secrets, adultery, etc. Why would anyone let their marriage fall to pieces, just because one person is curious of intimacy outside of the relationship. I believe to truly be happy in a relationship you need to communicate, as long as those involved are honest about their thoughts, intentions, desires, and wants, I do not see the problem. There are a few examples in which a desire or intention, may not be meet because the other person involved does not like the idea, but that is part of relationship. If something can not be meet, it needs to be discussed, and if after discussion it can still not be meet, then the individual will just need to back down and then maybe discuss it again at a later date. Point being any issues can and must be resolved, otherwise the whole circle collapses.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
wsoxfan:
I commend you for being candid with people abut your lifestyle choices. I wish I were that way earlier in life. Now that i'm older, I talk about my sexual preferences a lot. Some people are shocked or disapproving, although they don't tell me to my face. But, you now, one has away of telling if someone disapproves.

My candor about my devotion to BDSM really started when my relationship with my Goddess seemed to take hold. I was so euphoric to be with someone like Her, especially at my age, that I wanted to shout it out to the world. That wasn't the most prudent thing to do, but I didn't care.

Stay true to yourself. Its advice I try to follow every day.
Sep 27, 2009
wsoxfan:
Are you on FetLife? I joined about 3 weeks ago. I've never been more sure of what I want. The BDSM lifestyle is something I want to live more than anything.

I have a mentor and guide toward realizing my destiny. She's someone who used to be on SG until a little over a week ago. We were friends for abut a year and a half. Now besides the other things I mentioned she's also my Protector.
Oct 5, 2009

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