susannahjoy

you ever get that feeling where it's like everyone else is out there living their life and you're not doing anything and are getting left behind in the process? not that it's their fault or anything, but you want to join them and cant. or dont know how. or something.

it's so cold outside that i think i need ice cream. god bless ice cream.

so for some odd reason the schools here have a snow day which means that my parents are home, which sux. there's not really much snow on the ground, but whatever. today i was suposed to go hang out with nick some more, but i really need to go get a job, so i think i'll do that instead. i'm sure he'll get over it....
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ok, well, apparently missy can only meet on tues and thursday at 5, which i guess could work, but it's cutting it close. i'll see if i can leave class early. how long does it take to get from bakersfield to la does anyone know? it'd require the grapevine, which i hate, but oh well. blech. so hopefully next thursday, or the tuesday after that....
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i'm at school killing time before my medical terminology class. fun stuff. gotta love looking at naked chicks in the librarry... no one's complained though. i just emailed missy asking her what was going on with my interview, i tried to be all super polite not just "i want to do this so hurry up dammit!!!" even though tha'ts pretty much how i feel cuz...
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*yawn* i'm sleepy

just so you all know, randumb_thought is the coolest guy ever cuz he bought me some wings. that's so awesome. i've wanted them for like, forever and ever and he bought them for me and that was so sweet and now i think i must love him forever. and hopefully i get accepted to the site so when i make a set with them it'll...
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i'm too impatient. MISSY!!! when can we have an interview? I can't on tuesdays or thursdays (unless they're kinda late), or mon or wed nights, but i'm free the rest of the time!

ok i'm torn. ephedra or alcohol? i dont want to mix the two...

good morning everyone! ok, so i was bad. i normally dont drink.. and i'm not drunk or anything, but i did wake up and have a nice big sip of a mudslide. i love those things. in fact, i think i'm gonna go get some more.

well, i'm still alive. i dunno. fucking life. right when i'm all set to end it suddenly everything starts kinda getting better... i give it a week before it all falls apart again.

i'm so messed up. ugh. all my pereceptions all my desires and thoughts and everything are being turned upside down right now and id ont know what's real or just in my imagination. how am i supposed to be devolping as a person if i dont even know who i am?