superfall

I'm in a weird state right now. Things have improved with Amy. We've reached a tacit understanding, but I'm still in the dark on things. I know there are a lot of things going on in her life right now, so I am trying to keep from adding to it. I've mentioned that we need to discuss us, but she's told me a couple of...
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Today was one of those "quiet" days for me. Every now and then I get where I'm a little moody and quiet. I was in a good mood, just quiet. Maybe focused is a better word. I have a lot of projects on my plate that haven't been finished and need to be in a short time. I've only had one or two incidents like...
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Things are getting hectic at work. It seems everyone has a project or work that needs to be done right now. I'm still not as stressed as I was when I was working in the Albertsons office in Florida, but I am feeling a little bit of the tension.

I question myself and double question myself too much when it comes to being in a...
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I am frustrated with my goddaughter's family. I did commit to visiting with her throughout the year. As I've stated in earlier blogs, I'm the only father figure she has. She's absolutely adorable. She'll be 10 in February and she looks like she' 6. She is very intelligent though. Well, her mother is talking to me about planning out the year and before I know...
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I've really been thinking a lot this week about Amy and me (as you can tell from all of the blogs). A couple of things that I've decided on or I've had trouble letting Amy know have come clear.

First, I know that she thinks it's unfair that I wait on her situation to get better. The reality is that I'm not waiting. I was...
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Today was my last day visiting with my family. It was fun while it lasted. I'm looking forward to getting back and getting into a routine again. My first focus is going to be on my health. Amy would be my ultimate choice to focus on, but she needs space to deal with everything going on in her life. I can be patient. Meanwhile I...
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It's been a great couple of days. I love being around my family. We cut up and and have fun. I got to spend some time with my brother. There are things that he can tell me that he can't tell my mother and father and I think he takes my advice more seriously because we're of the same generation.

Things with Amy are good....
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I'm going to help my brother feed the farm animals today at the living history 1870's model farm he works at in the Land Between the Lakes National Park. The farm is closed to visitors for the season, but the animals don't know that. So, obviously they have to be fed. This is just a way my mom is getting me out of the house...
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I guess I am obsessing, and if I don't stop I'm going to chase Amy away.

She called this morning. I feel a lot better about everything now, but if we ever get a chance to talk I'm going to have to tell her what happened to me the last holday season so she can understand some of my paranoia.

Something else I decided on...
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Maybe I'm being obsessive?

Amy and I were supposed to at least talk yesterday and actually were supposed to see each other briefly. I left numerous messages on her phone yesterday and she never called me back. This brings up two things. First, I'm pissed that she didn't at least call and say she couldn't talk, but she hoped I'd have a safe trip or...
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