superfall

I am in a serious funk. I haven't worked out in two weeks. I don't feel like it and I'm not doing it. I've also been eating CRAP for meals. I feel down and I'm starting to feel stressed.

Today I know Amy is pissed at me about something. She's giving me the silent treatment and it's pissing me off. If I screwed up tell me and I will try to not do it again. I think this is because of a miscommunications about work. I explained the project as well as I could. She thought she understood what I was asking for. Both of us had no reason to question the other further because of those assumptions. It ended up not being clear. Now she's pissed because she's wasted her time trying to get this project done and it wouldn't work and she sees what I did as being the same thing she puts up with every day from the director she shares an office with. I'm not upset that the project isn't done. I accept that there was a misunderstanding. Now let's move on. What is pissing me off is that it's like she's punishing me for it.

I can blow up about it or I can be an asshole and just not ask her to help me anymore. That will leave more time for her to deal with Frank's projects. Either way is not to my liking. I just don't like strife at work. I've spent too much time in a hostile work environment to want to spend anymore time in another. Part of my frustration is also my doubts about us. I feel that I'm just an afterthought to her plans. This is unfair I know. We talk or txt almost daily outside of work and she has a lot of issues going on with her family. However, I can't help but feel that I'm excluded or a convenience. I know it's not fair, but that's what I'm feeling. A lot of it probably has to do with this feeling of depression I'm going through and not for any logical reason.

I don't know.