suiciety

everything just leads to now. all that bathroom surgery that was in response to the moment meant nothing. not even to the moment. i have a box in which i keep small pieces of my heart. every so often i like to water it back to life. i want to make sure every piece can still bloom into an iridescent orchid. peer in, not through. a translucent garden painted in the most phantasmal blue. do you remember those 6 hours? you could have had me then as you have me now. its just that im missing you along with every last taste from your lips. its not what you did that night, its what you said in your eyes. when you read this, know that i'm spinning around us.