My life is falling apart AGAIN peice by peice! I swear I can't take men any more! I should just become a full Lesbian instead of being just Bisexual! Then maybe I would happy in my life for once!
It never seams like I can win with any thing any more!
Every time I do something it always seams like it's wrong!
My boyfriend is driving up a fucking wall and I can't take it! It seams like I can't have any new friends. Ever since I started going out with him full time 3yrs ago I have lost all but 2 of my friends
and ever since I started hanging out with JonL he has gotten so weird with me especially when he found out she is a lesbian! I don't know how to deal with him any more! I am going to have another mental break down soon I know it, and mine aren't fun!
I just wish I could find someone who made me happy for once! It just pisses me off because I thougth I found the one I want to spend the rest of my life with and now I don't know. It's like now I lost 3yrs of my life that I could have spent with my friends and more! I just don't know what to do any more. I just keep thinking I want to die! Grrrr.....I hate feeling like this! I thought these feelings would never come back but I guess I was wrong!
UGH!
Well on another note, I can't stop thinking about JonL! I feel so bad for her right now. Just 2 days ago one of the kids she Graduated with Died in a car accident, he lost controle of the car and that's all I know. One of her best friends sister has been in a Coma for 8days now cause a Drunk Driver hit there car. And then I just found out that it is officaly over with her and her girlfriend as of this past Thursday! All I can think about is how I want to help her. I wish I could take all her pain away so she doesn't feel it any more but I know I can't do that because if I could I wouldn't be feeling like I am feeling right now! I hate when this kind of stuff happens to people I care about! GOD I CAN'T TAKE IT ANY MORE!
It never seams like I can win with any thing any more!
Every time I do something it always seams like it's wrong!
My boyfriend is driving up a fucking wall and I can't take it! It seams like I can't have any new friends. Ever since I started going out with him full time 3yrs ago I have lost all but 2 of my friends
and ever since I started hanging out with JonL he has gotten so weird with me especially when he found out she is a lesbian! I don't know how to deal with him any more! I am going to have another mental break down soon I know it, and mine aren't fun!
I just wish I could find someone who made me happy for once! It just pisses me off because I thougth I found the one I want to spend the rest of my life with and now I don't know. It's like now I lost 3yrs of my life that I could have spent with my friends and more! I just don't know what to do any more. I just keep thinking I want to die! Grrrr.....I hate feeling like this! I thought these feelings would never come back but I guess I was wrong!
UGH!
Well on another note, I can't stop thinking about JonL! I feel so bad for her right now. Just 2 days ago one of the kids she Graduated with Died in a car accident, he lost controle of the car and that's all I know. One of her best friends sister has been in a Coma for 8days now cause a Drunk Driver hit there car. And then I just found out that it is officaly over with her and her girlfriend as of this past Thursday! All I can think about is how I want to help her. I wish I could take all her pain away so she doesn't feel it any more but I know I can't do that because if I could I wouldn't be feeling like I am feeling right now! I hate when this kind of stuff happens to people I care about! GOD I CAN'T TAKE IT ANY MORE!
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
Spending a few more years just dating and making friends could be what you need. Settling down with the guy you dated at 17 might be premature.
Good luck and I hope things get better for JonL.