Someone told me not too too long ago that I am a horrible updater. Well Maybe I am. So here is an attempt at being a better one.
I wish I knew exactly when my niece is going to be born, I want to make a countdown. I am so excited about being an Uncle. I mean now I get to be the "drunk Uncle" that every family has. SWEET!!! Though my girlfriend says I'm not allowed. BOOOO!!! Oh well but what I am allowe dto do and plan to do is spoil that little girl rotten, loud colorful noise making annoying toys with a lifetime supply of batteries and TONS OF CANDY. That is my goal with my niece. Give her back to her mother all wound up and raring to go. Too bad I have to wait a couple years for that.
Hmmm, lets see. Oh yes, St. Patty's Day. Oh the fun that was had. I love being Irish. We went to this bar. An Irish Bar. And my friend was talking to this chick. I noticed that she wasn't wearing green. She told me that she hated St. Patty's Day. I told her she was in the wrong place and told her that needed to be punished for not wearing green And what is the universal punishment? A pinch of course. Well she freaked when I told her I was going to pinch her waved her hand at me and I knocked her cigarette into her full drink. Needless to say she was a total bitch and gave me the worst stare and refused to drink it. So I, being a concerned drinker, Chugged her drink. So not to let mine get warm of course. I thinks she disliked that even more. Hey, I offered to buy her a new drink, she just stared her anti-irish hatred toward me and walked away. So the moral of this story is. If you don't like St. PAtty's Day then don't go to an Irsish bar and not wear green becasue some drunken Irishman is going to 1. Pinch You 2. Ruin your cigarette and 3. Drink your girly drink.
So I hope that I have been a better updater this time. Have a good day.
Days left til I am civilian: 209 days
I wish I knew exactly when my niece is going to be born, I want to make a countdown. I am so excited about being an Uncle. I mean now I get to be the "drunk Uncle" that every family has. SWEET!!! Though my girlfriend says I'm not allowed. BOOOO!!! Oh well but what I am allowe dto do and plan to do is spoil that little girl rotten, loud colorful noise making annoying toys with a lifetime supply of batteries and TONS OF CANDY. That is my goal with my niece. Give her back to her mother all wound up and raring to go. Too bad I have to wait a couple years for that.
Hmmm, lets see. Oh yes, St. Patty's Day. Oh the fun that was had. I love being Irish. We went to this bar. An Irish Bar. And my friend was talking to this chick. I noticed that she wasn't wearing green. She told me that she hated St. Patty's Day. I told her she was in the wrong place and told her that needed to be punished for not wearing green And what is the universal punishment? A pinch of course. Well she freaked when I told her I was going to pinch her waved her hand at me and I knocked her cigarette into her full drink. Needless to say she was a total bitch and gave me the worst stare and refused to drink it. So I, being a concerned drinker, Chugged her drink. So not to let mine get warm of course. I thinks she disliked that even more. Hey, I offered to buy her a new drink, she just stared her anti-irish hatred toward me and walked away. So the moral of this story is. If you don't like St. PAtty's Day then don't go to an Irsish bar and not wear green becasue some drunken Irishman is going to 1. Pinch You 2. Ruin your cigarette and 3. Drink your girly drink.
So I hope that I have been a better updater this time. Have a good day.
Days left til I am civilian: 209 days
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
hyenahell:
I'm adding you because I love little brothers. 
And I thought you niece was coming on the 4th?
And I thought you niece was coming on the 4th?
reversehalo:
Happy bday, jackass. 